After an episode capper like that, it is always fun to see the show-only viewer’s reactions. Our newbie recapper Oz of Thrones shares his thoughts on last night’s episode, after the break.
Spoiler note: The discussion in this post is primarily for non-book readers (book fans can discuss the show here). We ask all the series veterans to refrain from posting spoilers in the comments here, veiled or otherwise. This show is best viewed without knowing all the surprises beforehand, so please be respectful of your fellow fans. Thank you!
Oz of Thrones: Hello all Unsullied and Sullied from myself and the inhabitants of House Oz. Episode 23 has come and gone, and it did not disappoint. This one was entitled “Walk of Punishment”, but may have been better suited to something along the lines of “Things Lost in Westeros” as we were subjected to an uncanny amount of loss in this installment. These losses include, but may or may not be limited to, the following: a Tully, a Master of Coin; a Pie, a lot of Crows, a band of Torturers, a Red Snatch, Podrick’s virginity, a dragon (presumably), and a hand (definitely).
Let us cover them one by one. And to the Sullied, please remember that we, the Unsullied non-book reader, know nothing about what is coming (other than Winter). Comment away, but may you please not spoil us. We will discuss, speculate, and make mostly uneducated guesses of things to come.
Loss of a Tully: We join the Stark clan in Riverrun at the funeral of Hoster Tully, where Anguy (the marksman that almost shot Hot Pie in the head last week) is NOT the person attempting to light the funeral boat on fire with a flaming arrow, but rather a Tully named Edmure. Another Tully (who we would find out later is a badass called “Blackfish”) yanks the bow away and successfully shoots the flaming arrow setting the boat ablaze, and never even has to look back to see that he nails his target. Robb later confronts Edmure about disobeying orders regarding the Mountain and capturing a couple of insignificant Lannister relatives. The Blackfish consoles Cat about losing Bran and Rickon reminding her that they don’t know for sure if they are dead.
Loss of a Master of Coin (but gaining a new one): A counsel meeting is attended by Tywin, Tyrion, Cersei, Littlefinger, Pycell, and the return of Varys (who consequently suffers from a loss of manhood from years ago). Littlefinger is ordered to give up his post as Master of Coin to wed Lysa Arryn, which opens the door for the exciting return of the 10 year old breast-feeding boy. Awesome! (Ozzette thinks I am sick). Tyrion is named the new Master of Coin. Hear Hear.
Loss of a Pie: It seems this may be the last time I get to effectively use “ArGenPie”, as Pie decides not to travel on with Arya, Gendry, and the BwB, but remain behind to be a glorious bread maker. It is unclear as to where they are traveling to, but the Hound is along for the ride as well. But not Pie. A man will miss Pie. Pie is good. Goodbye Pie.
Loss of a lot of Crows: Mance and Jon Snow, among others, come upon a circular pattern of horse heads and carcasses with none of the deceased Night’s Watch to be found. Assuming those men are now part of the White Walkers army, Mance commands Tormund, accompanied by Jon Snow, Orell, and 20 men, to climb the wall on his signal. Meanwhile, Mormont and the exhausted Crows stop at Craster’s for rest and a presumably a meal. Sam, who can’t seem to escape the Beyond the Wall bullying, gets yet another dose from Craster about his weight. Sam walks out and comes up on a tent where Gilly is giving birth to a baby boy.
Loss of a Torturer: Theon is set free by an unnamed man and is told to ride east where Yara is waiting on him. Later, the captors catch up with Theon and are about to check his prostate (I assume), but instead get a poking of their own.
Loss of the Red Snatch: Stannis is seen asking the Red Woman where she is going and when she will be back. He wants another son, but is turned down by the Red Woman because she states that Stannis does not have the strength and that it would kill him (or maybe, she just has a headache). Apparently magic has some limits, and there must be sacrifices.
Loss of a Dragon: Dany negotiates buying the Unsullied, and wants all 8,000 of them. However, she does not have enough gold to buy them all, so she offers a dragon to the foul mouthed slave trader, Krazyns (sp?). It will be interesting to see if this transaction actually goes through.
Loss of Virginity: Tyrion owes a debt of gratitude to Podrick for saving his life. As Pod looks to be wanting to order “Rack of Ros” off of Littlefinger’s menu, Tyrion sets up a buffet of naked Cirque Di Soleil performers for him. Saving Tyrion’s life has its advantages. But why was the money returned? Did Littlefinger pick up the tab, or was Pod just too fast to justify charging him?
Loss of a Hand: Jaime and Brienne are held at the camp of Locke and his men. As they prepare to have their way with Brienne, Jaime offers sapphires to Locke and Brienne is safely returned to the camp. But when Jamie starts discussing his father, his use of fancy words, and the land and gold he would give for his safe return, it apparently strikes a nerve with Locke, and he punishes Jaime. The hand of the Kings’ son no longer has a hand.
Episode 303 Personal Awards
Favorite Scene: Tough call, as the whole episode was solid. Tie between Mance and the Wildlings finding the horse waste and ordering the attack on the wall; and of course, Jaime and Locke.
Favorite Serious Quote: “When its time I’m going to light the biggest fire the north has ever seen.” -Mance Rayder (this, of course, was in the previews of the season. But put into context of the episode, it was classic).
Favorite Not-So-Serious Quote: “Marei is quite the spear handler herself” –Tyrion introducing one of the lovely brothel employees to Podrick
Ow, That Shit Hurts Award: The loss of a hand……. The examination of Theon’s rear probably would have been a close second had it happened.
Closing Thoughts: Outstanding 53 minutes of television, and one I will definitely view again for a late week post. I was shocked at the Ginsu knife demonstration on Jaime’s hand, without a doubt. But maybe the most shocking was that Dany was willing to give up her biggest dragon for the 7,877 Unsullied she couldn’t pay for (hey, we are worth it, right?). As I mentioned last week in my Looking Forward Ep. 23 here, I was very intrigued to see Noah Taylor (Locke) bring his acting style to GoT, and man did he bring it. This guy can pull of anything. We also found out that Jaime does indeed have some sentiment for the well-being of Brienne. I can only wonder how his new problem will affect him.
Off Topic: Being way ahead of the times as I am with all technological advances, a man is considering opening a Twitter account. Would you recommend it? Do you enjoy it? Any advice? Would you follow Oz?
Please respect the Unsullied. Comments welcome. Spoilery not.
Be on the lookout for Looking Forward Ep. 24 for Non-Book Readers on Thursday or Friday, and until then, may there be peace in your realm. -Oz