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Oz of Thrones: The moment we have all been waiting for… well, some of us have been waiting for has come and gone, but is safely stored on the House Oz DVR for essential subsequent viewings. And there it will stay until your face graces the cover of the Season 4 Box Set. Welcome home, my dear.
But Episode 5 was not an overall joyous occasion, for with acquisition comes forfeiture. You gain a favorite; you lose a favorite. And dammit man, for Locke the end came to soon. At least he went out in original fashion.
Let’s discuss the fantasy yin and yang that is Game of Thrones, where enjoyment meets despair and then repeats, yet never seems to get old.
The King Without a Pounce
Tommen is crowned and Marg and Cersei discuss the possibility of more weddings to come. Cat lovers have reason to be outraged that Ser Pounce was not shown in attendance. Cersei seems open to the idea of Marg still becoming the Queen, but that has to be total kitty litter. I won’t be surprised if she eventually tries to claw Marg’s eyes out.
Irrelevant topic: Would Pycelle be able to walk in a more upright position if he removed some of the metal appendages that always seem to be weighing down his neck? He is the Mr. T of Westeros without the mohawk.
Dany Is Coming to Wester… oh, nevermind
Dany is shown holding a meeting with all of the essential personnel and word comes that Astapor and Yunkai are in disarray. I guess I understand the significance of being able to control what you have already conquered before moving on to bigger goals. That being said, Dany has been talking about taking what is hers since S1 and while progress has been made, she doesn’t seem to be in any hurry to do it.
Irrelevant topic: Has the word “Khaleesi” even been said this season? On average at the halfway point, we’ve at least heard it said five times or more by Jorah alone.
More Relevant Topic: Again, where are the dragons? The dragon lovers must be growing impatient.
The bewb was not exposed, yet an older Robin still lay firmly on his mother’s breast, as happy as you would expect any man resting on Lysa’s breast to be.
OK, before you all throw up, I am kidding. But finally the itch is scratched and the fruitcake is back in the kitchen. And this Lysa is different. She seems so relaxed. So happy. So full of life. This is Xanax Lysa.
And then it becomes painfully apparent that Lysa is not as predisposed to me as I once thought. She and Baelish have a long history that includes earlier romantic encounters and she is obviously thrilled to be engaged to him. Those damn Lannisters that killed your husband… wait, what? You did it? You killed Jon Arryn? You want to get married right now? Sure, can I take a shower? Hell no. There’s no time like the present. Say your vows Petyr! The game of moans is afoot!
And this, my friends, is why I hold this enchantment with Lysa. You never know what the hell she is going to do.
Irrelevant topic: Did anyone else think it was weird to watch Littlefinger make out with someone? Or is this merely a jealousy issue?
Irrelevant topic #2: Lysa is a screamer.
Later, Lysa finally puts her crazy pants back on when she all but accuses Sansa of sleeping with Petyr and potentially carrying his baby. Luckily, the Xanax kicks back in and Sansa finds solace where so many others have found it: in the bosoms of Lysa. Oh, and you are going to marry Robin. Welcome to safety.
The Tywin Mines
Tywin and Cersei discuss marriage and money and it becomes more apparent that the Cersei/Loras planned nuptials may actually take place after all. Did I understand correctly that Tywin might be broke, or was it the fact that the mines are not churning out income at this point in time? Either way, the Iron Bank is owed a “tremendous” amount and will likely cause issues for the realm soon.
Relevant Topic: Stannis?
The Needle in the Hound
We catch up with Sandor trying to get some sleep as Arya runs through her list of the damned. I enjoyed the dancing sword homage and the Syrio mention, and the Hound’s responses were classic as always. But I also felt like this scene was inserted for no real reason as it had little bearing on the episode itself. Perhaps if they had mentioned the Vale, this scene would have been more at home.
Relevant topic: In terms of acting, Rory McCann has been overlooked at times in his portrayal of the Hound and deserves to be considered for some type of supporting role accolade. The guy just nails it.
No Experience Resquired
The newest odd couple of Westeros, Pod and Brienne, are en route to the Wall in search of Sansa. Pod did not read his mandatory squire copy of Horseback Riding for Dummies or Cooking Rabbit for Dummies, yet Brienne realizes she needs him anyway. Pod is quickly becoming one of the more entertaining characters in this series and I think this pairing will be quite enjoyable.
Oberyn, the Poet
Cersei catches up with Oberyn and reveals that he is a legendary fighter and is feared throughout Westeros. I’m not exactly sure what the point of this scene was other than to point out that Oberyn has a reputation and wants to give Tyrion a fair trial, and that Cersei has a gift for Myrcella. Maybe there will be more to it revealed later.
Irrelevant Topic: Did Oberyn have more silver highlights in his hair?
The Keep scenes made this episode what it was, and were very well done. I can’t decide if Jojen is about to die or is just in need of food and water or rest, but I loved the dialogue between he and Karl.
The Hodor crushing of Locke was, for lack of a better term, awesome. The flip side is that we lose Noah Taylor, and that just blows. We gained a Lysa. We lost a Locke. And for most likely what will be the final time, I get to say, TECH SUPPPORT. All hail Noah Taylor. If you happen to read this Noah, thanks for being a part of this epic story. You only made it better.
The Karl/Jon fight scene was one of the best in the show to date, IMO. Well executed and choreographed.
And finally, we may have seen the last of Crasters. Nothing good ever happens at the Keep, but in the end something finally did.
Episode 405 Personal Awards
Favorite Scene: The Keep scenes, although Kate Dickey portrays Lysa beautifully.
Most Shocking Quote: “I will not sail for Westeros.” -Dany (sarcasm font)
Sansa’s Favorite Quote : “Aahhhh. Oahhhh. Aahhhh. Aahhh. Ohhhh. Ahhhh.” -Lysa
Ow, That Shit Hurts Award: Karl getting the business in his throat.
Final Thoughts: The return of Lysa was bittersweet due to the loss of Locke and it remains to be seen exactly how her insertion back into the story is important (ew… maybe that was a bad choice of words). Regardless, her mood swings and overall nuttiness have always been intriguing, and her jealousy surrounding Petyr make her even more volatile.
The action sequences at Craster’s brought a great end to the episode and a horrible location, but as a whole I felt like 405 was choppy and a bit slow at times. I realize the importance of storytelling, but a couple of the scenes left me wondering exactly what the show was trying to accomplish. I will defer judgment until later.
That’s it for me today Ladies and Sers! What were your favorite quotes? Scenes?
Likes? Dislikes? Grumblings? Sound off…. Everyone is welcome.
BUT NO SPOILERS HERE! NO HINTS! NO BOOK RELATED DISCUSSION!
A man can be followed in the birdverse now @ozofthrones.
Make sure you tune in sometime Saturday for the 2nd annual Looking Forward Halftime Show! I can’t claim it’s as entertaining as the Super Bowl’s equal, but where else offers a GoT mid-season extravaganza?
Until then, have a great week, have a slice of Lysa fruitcake, and may there always be peace in your realm. –Oz
“Unbowed. Unbent. Unsullied.”
PLEASE BE MINDFUL OF THE UNSULLIED… Do not post spoilers in this comment thread!