The Tweeters on the Wall
By Fire And Blood on in Editorial, Humor, Recap.

twitter-bird2-square-webtreatsetcAhoy anon!

Once more, with feeling, it’s Twitter time!

Benioff and Weiss wrote their asses off, Marshall directed the best action of his life, and Djawadi was pitch-perfect. Twitter sang its song; it now falls to us to do good by them all.

As ever, I, your friendly FaBtastic @Axechucker, along with my stolid partner-in-crime, rockin’ @The_Rabbit01, collected tweets for Game of Thrones’ season 4 episode 9, “The Watchers on the Wall,” and hung ‘em up for your perusal.

Etc, blah blah blah, if you’re new to this, well, tough Thenns, buddy.

My all-stars for tonight were bad-girl Brandi (@thatone_girl07), our very own @WiCThoros (what, we can be funny too), and @Handsome_Jake_, who basically just went off on the best Olly tangent ever.

Special mention to @ShantaFabulous, whose love for Jon Snow cannot be measured by any mere mortal, and who may even challenge me for the Throne of Fabulousness.

Let’s sing no more! Git ‘er dun!

So I started out by asking what you, the Tweeting audience, was looking forward to most!

@ThrilledGoTFan: STANNIS STANNIS STANNIS

LOL no.

@SamDianeK: Maester Aemon being baller

@SomeoneSmewhere: Deaths that didn’t happen in the books!

Practically guaranteed.

@AbedsHappyPlace: Tormund vs. Alliser!

@AryaUnderfoot99: Jon vs Ygritte!

@Ninaberry: Ygritte proving once and for all the Jon Snow knows nothing!

@dieslaughing: Jon getting some goddamn respect.

@Shardfox: definitely Jon vs. Ygritte. But I’m still crying about that coming up and about Oberyn..been crying over that since the book tho

@AryaUnderfoot99: GRRM vs my heart

@7373tinkerbell: “THE BIGGEST FIRE THE NORTH HAS EVER SEEN!”

@BreakingBraavos: Jon defending Joff’s legacy

@TheRedWoman: Orell’s eagle burning.

You would want that.

@djjoycie: I’ll switch to the NBA finals to see my Spurs… AFTER #GameOfThrones … I got priorities

Good call.

Any actual predictions?

@rands: Your favorite character dies horribly. #obviousspoilers

@UberVero: I might have ran out of favorite characters.

@EmilyMaxberry: STILL PISSED ABOUT NED STARK. #STILLBITTER

@TaraGiancaspro: Wonder how many people care about the minutiae of Castle Black enough to justify a whole episode of it

@MajorPaynEX: Aight Nights Watch put up or shut the fuck up time

@ricogstacks: I understand the willing struggle

@HarleyHorcrux: EPISODE STARTS IN FIVE MINUTES, LETS START TAKING SHOTS NOW

@undercover_emi: Pssst #Gameofthrones please don’t kill anyone who doesn’t die in the book! #watchersonthewall please?…

Ha.

So the episode began!

@leeboyjenkins: No nudity in this episode, bummer.

@undercover_emi: No nudity? Travesty! Though it is a bit cold up there…

No topless wildlings! A few headless ones…

The “Previously on…” gave us a hint as to what this episode would be about!

@caseykassidy: Previously on #GameOfThrones Jon had the greatest hair in all of the 7 kingdoms. Tonight on #GameOfThrones this trend continues

@Po1oAssassin: Is this whole episode gonna be about John Snow?

Yes.

And so we began…

@JonSnowBastrd: Keep calm, and hum with the Game of Thrones theme song.

@BeautyBrienne: At least Winterfell doesn’t have a Bolton pog on it.

@mherr1979: I guess we’ll see if Kit can carry an episode by himself. I’m confident!

The episode open with Jon and Sam commiserating atop the Wall.

@caseykassidy: On a dark and stormy night, on top of The Wall, a portly man has an awkward sex convo with the most lovely man in the world.

@becca_diane11: It like Sam and Jon are in the Night’s Watch Time Out.

@JonSnowBastrd: I’ve got a 100,000 wildling problems, but at least I’m not Theon.

@AngryGoTFan: NO!!! JON IS IMPRISONED IN AN ICE CAGE FOR 4 DAYS THERE IS NO JUSTICE!!! #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

Sam, understandably, has questions.

@feellikepdiddy: Awkward bro-talk with Jon and Sam #VowBreakingIsCodeForSex

@thelionshire: She had red hair. There ! Jon snow knows something

@motelsonthemoon: “How big were her feet?” Sam the Foot Fetisher.

@YgrittetheWild: C’mon JAWWWN GIMME ALL THE DETAILS FER ME SPANK BANK

@SeattleSlim: “It’s warm and squishy, Sam.”

@saraberra88: Jon Snow explains sex; and it didn’t sound as bad as it could’ve

@ShantaFabulous: Lord, Kit is fine.

@Sir_Davidio: Now kiss

@7373tinkerbell: Sams looking for a loophole for some booty

@WiCThoros: Did Sam just ask Jon to offer?

@EmpressTina: Sam looks on the bright side of life.

Great. Now I have that song in my head. Thanks.

@LaMikoLeMiko: Look at Sam trying to wiggle his way around the no pum-pum vow

@ashley_joelle: You go Sam you find those loopholes in the oath lol #NightsWatch

@snacky: The Night’s Watch vows are actually, “take no wife, father no children, sneak off to the brothel at every opportunity.”

@GameOverRos: Samwell Tarly: future lawyer. Did he just find a loophole in the vows?

@buddha_katt: loll Sam is apparently part of #WellActually twitter.

@TaraGiancaspro: Sam is talking about head and I have never been more entertained.

@BigSBrain: “Head isnt cheating, is it?” Sam Tarly.

He’s only riding Bill Clinton’s coattails.

@Handsome_Jake_: NOT A BLEEDING POET

@pinklem73: You are definitely not a poet, Jon Snow.

@motelsonthemoon: It’s okay Jon, not everyone can be a poet like Oberyn “the dead viper” Martell

@CCozzetto: We are 2 minutes in and Jon’s hair is the clear star of this episode

As it should be. As it should be.

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@feellikepdiddy: HEDWIG?!

HEDWIG IS DEAD. However, I did enjoy their various owl transitions!

@undercover_emi: The owls are not what they seem!! Wait wrong show… Or right show? #twinpeaks

@WiCThoros: There’s someone on the other side of that OWL…

@cam_diesel: THEY’RE WARGING ON Y’ALL!!!!!!!!!!!

We go south of the Wall, and catch up with Ygritte, Tormund, and the rest of the Wildling Crew. TORMUND HAS TALES TO TELL.

@duckandcover: Is Tormund talking about a — oh, he’s talking about fucking a bear. Well all right.

@Handsome_Jake_: Thormund is amazing

@Sir_Davidio: Har! You doubt that Tormund had sex with a bear? You don’t know Tormund!

@ShantaFabulous: Styr! *spits* #DemThrones

@ShantaFabulous: I hate Styr. Hate. #DemThrones

I can tell!

@NiceQueenCersei: Ginger minge? Now I know what to call every redhead. Ever.

@AngryGoTFan: THENNS DID NOT SPAKE THE COMMON TONGUE ITS WELL ESTABLISHED!!!!! #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@KittenMcKay: I feel like Lord Snow’s “arrow” is longer than 6inches. #GameOfThronesPickupLines

@BeautyBrienne: And Ygritte looks 2 feet tall next to Borg!Thenn. #GameOfThrones #FactsAboutYgritte.

@YgrittetheWild: Got a neck spasm looking up that high. #fuckingthenns

@ReimHelix: Uh-oh, “Jon Snow is mine” I don’t think she meant as a kill either. That’s. HER man. Witches back off is what’s she saying XD

@SeattleSlim: Ygritte is HOT about it, you hear me? *cues ‘When a Woman’s Fed Up’ by R. Kelly*

@feellikepdiddy: The Thenns still look like Romulans to me #BeamMeUp

@duckandcover: You could say that Styr is .. styrring the pot .. right now.

Womp womp.

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@thatone_girl07: Ygritte is done with your shit

@JonSnowBastrd: From 1 to Ygritte, how bitter is your ex?

@BigDamnHerosSir: Damn. Uh, men of the Watch? I’m not saying to run, I’m just saying Ygritte is fucking PISSED and you should watch your shit

@clarina_vida: YGRITTE SE VOCÊ MATAR O JON EU ENFIO UMA DESSAS SUAS FLECHAS NO SEU COBRE RUIVO

@becca_diane11: Ygritte is not into Saturday Brunch gossip time

@motelsonthemoon: Ygritte and Styr sex scene please

@callmehasmik: Ygritte, you’re awesome! *throws cookies at her*

@ThrilledGoTFan: Ygritte replaces that lame arrow guy in the Next Avengers movie

@cam_diesel: Ygritte is SO mad. Jon Snow created a monster. Shit.

@thatone_girl07: Be my crow love and I’ll wear your fun bits around my neck #truelove

@BeautyBrienne: Ygritte also has interesting taste in jewelry.

@eohanley: Well thank God no one was looking at that road. Thanks for the distraction Ygritte. Love Gilly

Sam is visited in the library by Maester Aemon…

@duckandcover: Maester Aemon, the only Targaryen I can stomach watching right now.

@HarleyHorcrux: “Who else but Samwell Tarly would be wasting candles to read in the middle of the night?” I identify as Samwell Tarly

@theSamwellTarly: Maester Aemon shut the fuck up dude I don’t love her I just want to bone her.

@Bigswivel34: So aemon was a playa before he took the black I ain’t mad at that

@callmehasmik: Maester, you’re not as blind as you seem to be.

@valeisabel13: “Love is the death of duty. I told that to your friend Jon Snow once, he didn’t listen.”

@cam_diesel: Maester Aemon remembering what that thang tastes like right at this very moment.

@thatone_girl07: Aemon got the ladies. Obvs

@AngryGoTFan: NO AEMON SISTERS DONT COUNT BRAH #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@duckandcover: If he says Lyanna Stark, I’m out of here.

@theSamwellTarly: Oh shit Aemon is Jon Snow’s dad. A + L = J amirite?

@motelsonthemoon: Aemon is describing his horse.

So Sam leaves, and soon hears a familiar voice…

@ThrilledGoTFan: PYP OPEN THE FUCKING GATE

@BeautyBrienne: Clang. Clang. Sam’s balls just dropped.

@undercover_emi: Fuck Yeah! Apparently this is what Take-Charge Sam looks like. I like Take-Charge Sam!

It’s Gilly!

@7373tinkerbell: Omg gilly thank god

@juliejoyness: SAM!!!!!!! That mouth!

@AmyVernon: Sam’s gonna be doing a lot more cursing from now on… Or something.

FPM.

@thatone_girl07: Pyp is just so done with life

Spoiler!

@TheFreeHouseElf: Sam Tarly is bae.

@eelahnie: Samwell Tarly reminds me of Samwise Gamgee

Sure, if Frodo were a woman.

What.

North of the Wall…

@ThrilledGoTFan: MANCE RAYDER FINALLY LIT THE BIGGEST FART

@HarleyHorcrux: THE BIGGEST FIRE THE NORTH HAS EVER SEEN ASDFGHJKL

@ShantaFabulous: Haysoos Christos!

@rkbentley: Yep, *that’s* the biggest fire the north has ever seen.

@BeautyBrienne: How did NO ONE NOTICE that fire starting?

@MikkitheGazettE: That fire is beautiful, I’m sorry.

Speaking of sorry, Ser Alliser apologized to Jon Snow.

Well, sort of.

@GameOverRos: Did Thorne just suggest that Jon Snow knows something?

@BigDamnHerosSir: Are… are Aliser and Jon having a moment?

@BreakingBraavos: Aliser and Jon should go find a cave

@mherr1979: Aliser is still a douchenozzle.

@undercover_emi: Oh shit. Thorne is apologizing. He’s so going to die

@ashkhdgsjkhg: Ive heard of backhanded compliments……that was the first backhanded apology

@cam_diesel: HELL YEAH Y’ALL SHOULDA SEALED THE TUNNEL YOU IDIOT BASTARD!!!!!

@BeautyBrienne: I either have indigestion or a little wad of respect for Thorne.

@YgrittetheWild: Another L’Oreal Westeros pose.

Best Hair on the Show. It’s in the contract.

Sam takes Gilly and hides her away…

@WiCThoros: Fighting with Gilly is like fighting with a drunk girl….its always a level 10.

@BostonChina: Gilly got herself a good man

@aperscape: they actually let Hannah Murray be a person in this episode i love her so much

@authentrovert: Gilly is the real MVP.

Sam freakin’ kisses her!

@becca_diane11: A Sam and Gilly kiss?!?! Was that in the book??

@Sir_Davidio: SAM NO DON’T KISS HER YOU WHORE

@HarleyHorcrux: HE KISSED HER AJZJNENSJ

@marcelocordova: GO SAM! !

@ShantaFabulous: That’s right Sam! That’s your woman! #DemThrones

@DetroitDelta15: Oh wow!!! Get it Sam!!! #GameOfThrones #DemThrones

@feellikepdiddy: SAM AND GILLY SITTING IN A TREE, LOVE IS THE DEATH OF DUTY #RuinANurseryRhyme

@Merky__: Samwell’s first kiss!

@TreYip1922: Aww his first and possibly last kiss.

Harsh.

@theSamwellTarly: Does this mean I’m not a virgin anymore? #firstkiss

@BeautyBrienne: And finally @FatPinkMast’s star rises.

@TaraGiancaspro: FAT PINK MAST! FAT PINK MAST! FAT PIK MAST!

@mW_: Aw, Sam made his move. Sorry, tho, warnings said no nudity this episode.

@TaraGiancaspro: How is this show going to express the classic essence of “fat pink mast”?

@WiC_Fury asserted there should be a big, pink-sailed ship sailing past them before fade-out.

@wadadlikid: Sam… She wants the D! Tap fuck around!

@cam_diesel: THAT’S RIGHT SAM!!!!!! KISS YOUR BAE THEN GO FIGHT FOR HER LIFE!!!

@thatone_girl07: Samwell Fucking Tarly is perfect gtfo

@aerynsunx: Sam & Gilly. <3 Happiest thing that's happened this season.

@7373tinkerbell: I love you Sam

@Sir_Davidio: Fuck you SamxGilly shippers, Jon is the only one Sam needs

@duckandcover: “Wherever you go, I go, too.” Cut scene to a boat.

@MadMakNY: Sam promising that he won’t die is very bothersome. Anvils, anvils everywhere.

@GameOverRos: DO NOT PROMISE YOU WON’T DIE, SAMWELL. We saw that promise last week.

@BlackGirlNerds: Every time a girl says promise me you won’t die…their boo dies. I can’t. ::turns face away:: #DemThrones

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@YgrittetheWild: I promise I won’t die because I want more snogging.

@aerynsunx: Gilly! Oh shit, Sam dropping F-bombs to Pyp. And now he’s making a vow to Gilly? Maestro Aemon knew. It’s love, Sam.

So Sam and Pyp soon found themselves together again…

@WiCThoros: Poor Pyp….So scared he’s going to die …well..

@duckandcover: If they kill Pyp, Grenn, or Dolorous Edd, I’m out of here.

Uh oh.

@GoHugYourself: Give Samwell a kiss & he finds his sass. “I think we’re gonna die.” Sam, “If you keep missing we will.” #GillyPower

@undercover_emi: “If you keep missing we will!” Take charge Sam is still in action!

@becca_diane11: “If you keep missing we will” good line. So much sass from Sam.

@YgrittetheWild: Oh Sam feels… Enjoyed that exchange with Pyp

@GameOverRos: Sam, you just became one of my favourite characters. Which means you’re doomed.

Not doomed quite yet!

Outside, Ygritte sees the fire. It’s GO TIME!

@fsusean83: Dude its game time

@cam_diesel: Wildling’s war theme with elements of the Thenn’s theme >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

@CygnusA81: Here we go…

@ShantaFabulous: It’s about to be some shit. #DemThrones

@duckandcover: If your favorite character was a random Night’s Watch man, well, I’m sorry to say ..

@Handsome_Jake_: I need to do some push-ups or something I am so amped

And just north of the Wall, Mance Rayder’s army arrives… and it brought with it some strumph.

@BeatfaceRABS: mannnnnnnnnnnn what is that big hairy foot .

It was a mammoth. FaB was giddy. So were a lot of other people!

@ShantaFabulous: They got fucking mammoths. #DemThrones

@cam_diesel: OH SHIIIITTTTT!!!!!!! THE GIANTS ARE RIDING MASTADONS?!?!?!!?!?!?!!?!! MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!

@YgrittetheWild: THANK YOU FOR HAVING MAMMOTHS

@juanlozano70: Was that the woolly mammoth from “Ice Age?”

@RicaCherica: Giants? They have fucking Giants.

“…They have a cave tr—.”

@feellikepdiddy: “They’ve brought a cave troll” – Boromir Stark

I was totally going to say that!

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@caseykassidy: Ok, so the giants may be a problem

@JonSnowBastrd: Giants riding mammoths. We are screwed.

@BeautyBrienne: I think I just saw an Uruk Hai.

@AngryGoTFan: THE HAVE OFFICIALLY TURNED THIS INTO LORD OF THE THRONES #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@7373tinkerbell: I hope they can hold them off until dawn when gandolf comes

@MrNoeReyes: Mammoths and giants! This is going to be an intense battle.

@Handsome_Jake_: The budget for this episode must be insane

@becca_diane11: And there goes the rest of the CGI budget on the back of a woolly mammoth.

@thatone_girl07: “THIS ISNT WHAT I GOT ARRESTED FOR!” Everyone at Castle Black

@SeattleSlim: I see a dude as tall as a damn mammoth, I’m out. Like, that’s not in my contract, bro.

@AngryGoTFan: WHERE ARE MY STRAW CROWS?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@ginadee: Soon the Elves will come, right?

@theSamwellTarly: Someone call Legolas to kill that elephant thing damn.

What do your elf eyes see?

@ssscorvus: Not feeling good about these guys prospects lol

@HarleyHorcrux: GRENN PLS YOU HAD ONE JOB

@WilliamJTV: These cunts coulda use a lil more training.

Yeah, I put it on Thorne.

@Handsome_Jake_: Thorne has some redeeming qualities. He isn’t Janos

@feellikepdiddy: “THE DAY WILL COME WHEN THE COURAGE OF MEN FAILS, BUT IT IS NOT THIS DAY! THIS IS THE—” *receives note* — oh. This ISNT Helm’s Deep?

It kinda felt like Helm’s Deep.

But, you know. Real-er.

But anyway, that speech wasn’t from Helm’s Dee–

@feellikepdiddy: And yes, I know that speech isn’t from Helm’s Deep #semantics #GameOfTheRings #LordOfThrones

Fair enough.

@cam_diesel: OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT!!!!

@StayLaced19XX: No other show gives me anxiety like this

Just then Tormund, Ygritte, and the Thenns hit the south barricade. Tension was freaking tight.

@WiCThoros: I want Ygritte on my Dodgeball team…If you can dodge an arrow you can dodge a ball

DODGEBALL references will always be reblogged.

The Thenns are about to knock down the front doors, and Thorne knows it.

@motelsonthemoon: ALISTER THORNE INSPIRATIONAL SPEECH!!

@WiCThoros: I’m impressed with Allister Thorne this episode.

@BeautyBrienne: Dammit, don’t make me feel for Thorne now.

@YgrittetheWild: I shouldn’t be liking Alliser Thorne. #grudgingrespect

@SarahBlackfyre: Never thought I’d be cheering FOR Aliser Thorne.

@BigDamnHerosSir: Fetchez la vache! ~Aliser Thorne

Qua?

Tormund was tearing up shit, and Ygritte wasn’t missing any of her shots. They were dialed in. It was looking grim for the men in black.

@HarleyHorcrux: FUCKING LOVE TORMUND THO TBH

@mW_: Ygritte so badass this scene with the bow.

@ShantaFabulous: ygritye is bout that life #DemThrones

@GameOverRos: Yggy is taking out men like a pissed off, drunken Merida. That’s my Big Red!

@JonSnowBastrd: Ygritte is the most badass woman in Westeros.

@SeattleSlim: You mad, huh, Ygritte? #DemThrones

@BigDamnHerosSir: Oooh. Pissed-the-fuck-off Rose Leslie is the sexiest Rose Leslie. #girlcrush #noapologies

@cam_diesel: Yo. This shit CRAZY AS FUCK!!!! This what I thought the siege of King’s Landing was finna be like.

@BigDamnHerosSir: “Hmm. I can’t find Jon. I’ll just kill every black, curly-haired guy wearing black I see!” *5 min later* “Ah man, fuck this”

@motelsonthemoon: I really wish Ygritte and Tormund shouted out the number of people they killed.

“That only counts as one!”

@vanetaboada: Where is Tyron?!?!? Enough of the wall

Tyron in tha’ back. He hanging with Ran-D. Rockin’ with Mike, you know?

As for Tyrion, well, all I can give you is this:

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Janos Slynt is reintroduced to us. And that man is scared.

@YgrittetheWild: And Janos Slynt wets himself

@Sir_Davidio: “Giants don’t exist. Those are just… Weather balloons.”

@mherr1979: FUCK OFF, JANOS!

“I’m not questioning your honor, Lord Janos, I’m denying its existence.”

@ShantaFabulous: Lead, Jon! Lead em baby! #DemThrones

@feellikepdiddy: Can someone shove Janos Slynt off the wall?

Almost thought Grenn was going to. Canon or no. But all Grenn had to do was tell a little white lie.

@undercover_emi: Worked on Joffrey, works on Slynt. douchebags

@motelsonthemoon: This is a Grenn’s beard appreciation tweet

@BigDamnHerosSir: <3 Grenn, I would make out with you on a college dorm room twin XL bed while shitty rock music played in the background.

@becca_diane11: Grenn is like a wonderful bearded lumberjack. #ilikeit

@feellikepdiddy: Grenn is bae

@SlimWiggy: Basically #watchersonthewall is filler to make us suffer longer until we get back to Tyrion. I get that right?

Suffering happened, to be sure!

@KAMI2HOT: Jon Snow gives orders now, recognize!

@mW_: Oh, snap, the archers being lowered on ropes to shoot down off the Wall so awesome.

@ArielGlasman: “THOSE ARE GIANTS RIDING MAMMOTHS DOWN THERE.” Hahahahaha, way to say it, buddy.

@Handsome_Jake_: The budget for this episode must be insane

@AngryGoTFan: WHERE IS MANCES TURTLE?!?!?!?! ITS A BASIC SIEGE TACTIC YOU BABOONS!!!!! #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@mherr1979: You could not pay me enough money to hang off the Wall like that.

@vintageluxury__: Well. The wall is about fall.

O ye of little faith!

But some hurtin’ had to happen first.

@Sir_Davidio: That giant rolled a Nat 20

@misspamplona: This arrow by the giant? Fuckawesome.

@ShantaFabulous: Holy shit! That arrow is huge. #DemThrones

@cam_diesel: HOLY SHIT THAT GIANT ARROW THO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@saynomore23AS: HOLLLLYYYY SHIIIIIIT !!!!!!!

@SeattleSlim: Daaaaaaaaaaamn! His arrow had that cat flying through the air

@thatone_girl07: SHIT THAT WAS AWESOME OMFG

@aerynsunx: I gasped. I actually gasped out loud. #GiantArrow

@AngryGoTFan: AN ARROW GOING THAT SPEED WOULD FLY THROUGH A MAN NOT IMPALE HIM #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

Strong fletching?

Actually, the arc of the arrow, at its apex, would have been–

Ahh, why bother.

Down in the courtyard…

(Transitional THUNKKK!)

… Styr is kicking ass and not even bothering with names.

@BadbadBodevil: Holy shit Styr… does he have giants blood

@BigDamnHerosSir: Alright, I need to come to terms with the fact that I don’t actually hate the Thenns. I kinda like ‘em.

Ygritte found her mark more than often.

@Tanagariel: Ygritte is so damn badads hell yeah

@7373tinkerbell: Ygritte is where the term red headed devil came from #jonkillher

@aerynsunx: I think Ygritte is shooting at anything that even remotely looks like Jon Snow.

@PornProducer: Shit jut got real

@Shesgotblueeyes: My love for Ygritte knows no bounds

In the kitchens we are introduced to the Castle Black cook, Three-Finger Hobb.

He is a… violent man.

@WiCThoros: Well i guess I can cross seeing a guy beheaded by a cleaver off my #bucketlist

‏@motelsonthemoon: OMG MEAT CLEVER DUDE IS SO HOT!? WHERE THE HELL HAS HE BEEN ALL SEASON!?

Three-Finger Hobb does not answer to you. He is like Cheese Boy, or the King’s Landing Butler, only more violent.

@motelsonthemoon: Rt if you stan for Three Fingered Hobb, aka Hot Meat Cleaver Dude.

I STAN WITH HOBB!

So Slynt takes a moment to get the fuck out, basically.

@Bigswivel34: Slynt runs away what the hell

@HotelFoxtrot: Janos Slynt you effing coward!

@undercover_emi: Son of a bitch. Janos cannot handle this shit

@mherr1979: Seven hells, someone kill that coward.

@cam_diesel: King’s Landing buddy is the biggest punk ever.

@FittenTrim: Janos Slynt heard there was Wildings in the food locker and bravely rushed to protect it! #Hero

Right??

@becca_diane11: I hope Gilly kills Ser Janos

My first thought was to worry for Gilly. But then I was like, “Nah, she’d totally win.”

So Pyp gets a kill. Sam does not care.

@7373tinkerbell: Oh my Sam is my hero tonight

Pyp then gets killed.

And Sam cares.

So does everyone. Book-readers especially.

Surprise!

@theSamwellTarly: the night is dark and full of arrows to Pyp’s throat.

@ShantaFabulous: oh no

@BlackGirlNerds: Nah bruh…he ain’t alright. #DemThrones

@BeautyBrienne: OH FUCK PYP

@HarleyHorcrux: PYP WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHY whTzhebhzjsne

@cam_diesel: Ygritte got Pipp. Damn, dog. Surgical with that bow.

@undercover_emi: Nooooooo!!!!!!!!! Not Pypar!!!! The Fuck HBO?!? The Fuck!?!?!

@BigDamnHerosSir: I was just writing how much I was beginning to like Swagger Sam… but… but then Pyp..

@Vanny_Del: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

@TonnyKaru: Nooooooo #gotbr

@becca_diane11: Wait!!! Is Pyp going to die???

@GameOverRos: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT PYP, YOU BASTARDS!

@ThrilledGoTFan: PYP NOOOOOOOO WHYYYY

@marcelocordova: No!!! Pyp! !! Damn you Ygritte!!

@Handsome_Jake_: ANYONE BUT PYP

@preciouscorlew: NOT PIP WHAT THE ACTUAL HECK

@jpaablortiz: :(

@aerynsunx: Pyp! Oh, Pyp. *weeps*

@HarleyHorcrux: IM FUCKING MAD I LOVE PYP

@neverStirred: Did Sam just ask that guy was he alright? Wow #PFGoT #DemThrones

@SarahJohnson221: Poor pipp; arrow through the throat

Josef Altin’s best death. And he had a nasty cut throat in Eastern Promises.

@WiCThoros: One of the worst death scenes for me cause I didn’t know it was coming… #RIPPyp

@YgrittetheWild: Would you believe my fingers slipped? @JosefAltin <3

Dang, Ygritte.

@sm_gaines: I have to remember not to get attached to these characters. Lawd

@HarleyHorcrux: IM CRYING OVER PYP WBU

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Hey, this one’s not on George!

(…Most are.)

@ElleEmBoogie: This is one of the best episodes this season

It’s an episode 9. There are laws.

Back down near the tunnel, the giants hooked up their mammoth-haul…

@WiCThoros: Mammoths…the pickup trucks of westeros….PULL!

@NinaDance09: Team Giants on Mammoths

@Elita___One: GOOD GOD A WA DAT

@Handsome_Jake_: If they don’t mess up the end this is probably the best episode ever

@CCozzetto: Gimli! You got big!

@duckandcover: The role of the giant tonight will be played by Aberforth Dumbledore.

@TheBklynTimes: The giant thing is completely unfair on so many levels.

@GameOverRos: Quit standing there like you’re in a perfume ad, Jon Snow. Time to do something.

Jon DID do something!

Jon sent a certain someone to hold the tunnel… and book-readers kind of freaked out again!

‘Cause… yanno.

They knew.

@DeanZelikovsky: What Character dies Next?

@theSamwellTarly: Hill and Cooper are all like, fuucckkk

@undercover_emi: Not Grenn too. They can’t do this to me! I can’t look!

@HarleyHorcrux: IF THEY KILL OFF GRENN IM OUT

@lady_m28: NO, GRENN HAS TO LIVE!!

@duckandcover: GRENN, DON’T FUCKING LEAVE ME. I’M LITERALLY CRYING RIGHT NOW.

@theonsexj0y: ROSES ARE RED … VIOLETS ARE BLUE … PYP AND GRENN AND DOLORES EDD ARE BETTER THAN YOU

@motelsonthemoon: If Grenn dies, I riot.

Hide yo wives! Motels is gonna rampage!

Down below, Tormund went toe-to-toe with Ser Alliser.

@cam_diesel: Alister vs. Tormund. Yes. This is Ace vs Ace rightchea!!!

@Sir_Davidio: HOLY SHIT Ser Aliser vs Tormund. A giant twat vs Tormund’s giant member! HAR!

@LaurelStewart: Attracted to Tormund because manly

@BigDamnHerosSir: Holy CRAP Tormund Giantsbane… turns out the key to my pants is fighting like a demon with a sword in a backhanded grip #hot

@Mikaylarkey: So… I’m kinda hoping Allister the asshole dies

@GameOverRos: Why am I cheering for Thorne? He’s going against my beloved ginger ladder, Tormund.

@WiCThoros: The Allister vs Tormund fight was one of my favorite of the series.

It was freaking excellent. At one point Alliser baited Tormund into a lunge; Alliser then countered with a thrust with his sword around the outside of the bannister support, but Tormund blocked it and kept coming.

That was gold.

Meanwhile… Pyp is truly gone. Sam takes up a crossbow and makes a run for the lift…!

@undercover_emi: In your FACE cannibal Mother Fucker!!

@Cangri_LSU: Samwell Tarley!!!!!!! Shot that bitch in the head

@BeautyBrienne: Did…did Sam just kill Borg!Thenn?

@KieronMcC_: GO ON SAM!

@wolfca: IM FREAKING OUT SAM!

@Vanny_Del: Goddammit this fucking show is going to give me a heart attack! #GameofThrones #BringBackPip #GoSamwell #Ipickedthewrongweektostopdrinking

@iamtwoemms: I am just impressed with @Sam_theSlayer. Hell. Yes.

@eboldy: Fuck Yeah Sam Tarly

Sam briefly talks to Grenn, then talks young Olly out of his fear. CHEKOV’S BOW: SIGHTED.

@WiCThoros: Don’t look at the Bow! Kid NO!

Yup.

@cam_diesel: Ollie = Paris of Troy?

@HotelFoxtrot: If they kill Ollie I’m going to LOSE IT.

Olly was fine for now.

On the other side of the Wall, the mammoth at the gate is in for a warm surprise…

@callmejam: Yes!! Drop bombs on ‘em! #crowsvswildlings

@BlackGirlNerds: Mammoth’s ass is on fire! #DemThrones

@Kar_rie: Not red bull… Red mammoth

That fire gave him wings.

@AndreaCam31: Oh no Snuffleupagus caught on fire and ran away!

@motelsonthemoon: GIANTS ARE PPL TOO. EQUAL RIGHTS FOR GIANTS

Well, one giant had an equal right to get shot in the back!

@FaRaGuChi: Yooo big fuckin arrow

@thatone_girl07: DAMN SON WHAT A HIT

@KSchadWrestling: Took out a giant…nice!

@mherr1979: They just killed Gimli!

@YgrittetheWild: I hope that Wunwun

I think it was! Looked like the one Jon almost got stepped on by in Mance Rayder’s camp.

So Mag the Mighty goes to LIFT the gate…

@joethestampede: The Wildlings have a Hulk. #DemThrones

@victorinosbeard: DO THESE GIANTS EVEN LIFT, BRO?

@cam_diesel: If that is supposed to be the strongest gate in the world….and Giant buddy punched thru it and is crowbarring it open…..uh……YO!!!

@GameOverRos: SHIT IS ABOUT TO HIT THE FAAAAAAN!

Seemed like it!

Jon leaves the Wall to Edd…

@BlackGirlNerds: ::holds rosary beads and still prays for Jon’s survival:: #DemThrones

@thenblowonit1st: Jon Snow thinks he’s in charge (he obviously should be)…

@mherr1979: Dolorous Edd has the Wall. The world really is ending!

@BigDamnHerosSir: “LIGHT THE FUCKERS UP!” Edd, you fucking motivate me.

@YgrittetheWild: Dolorous Edd is Angry Edd now.

@BeautyBrienne: I like Edd. I hope he doesn’t die. He’ll probably die.

@flickchickdc: The main thing that’s entertaining me this episode is Jon Snow’s hair blowing majestically in the wind!

It did look good.

Grenn and his guys are in the tunnel now, and… it looks like trouble.

@motelsonthemoon: “Hold the gate. If they make it through, my ex is going to kill me and wear my balls around her neck.” “Bros 4 lyfe Jon”

@cam_diesel: HE LIFTING THE GATE BY HIS MOTHERFUCKING SELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NIGGA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

@ShantaFabulous: HOLD THE GATE!!!! #DemThrones

@WiCThoros: #HoldTheGate

@HarleyHorcrux: GRENN STEPPING IT UP AAAAY

@adarlansassasin: I AM THE SWORD IN THE DARKNESS … I AM THE WATCHER ON THE WALLS

@Handsome_Jake_: GET HIM GRENN

@Sir_Davidio: Grenn can’t die too pls no

@mherr1979: Grenn is too awesome to die.

@duckandcover: BATTLE OF I’M 100% FUCKING DONE WITH YOU GAME OF THRONES.

@YgrittetheWild: Alright that gave me chills and it wasn’t because they were at the gate under the Wall.

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In the courtyard, Jon Snow finally got into the fray.

And boy did he. Freaking whirling dervish.

@JusteSharlene: Yaasssss Jon Snow!!!

@mW_: Jon Snow kicking ass with his Valyrian steel.

@BigDamnHerosSir: Kit Harrington appears to be an exceptional actor-combatant.

@ShantaFabulous: That’s my baby! #DemThrones

@BlackGirlNerds: Jon Snow = GOAT #DemThrones

@anime23: Everyone else is a pansy for not jumping out of the elevator while it was moving like #JohnSnow #DemThrones

@JBlueNote: And so begins the fight for Jon Snow

@hokiepj: JON SNOW BITCHES!

@LynchLyfe: God Damn Jon snow is sexy.

@MJ_Rivera12: John Snow has never been hotter.

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I dunno, I knew more than a few people who found him “exceedingly cute” back when we first saw him.

@Handsome_Jake_: I don’t much like Jon but he fights like a fucking demon

@BlackGirlNerds: Jon Snow is too pretty to die. It can’t happen. #DemThrones

From there Ramin Djawadi’s music (I called it “Us vs. Thenns”) kicked in and Neil Marshall gave us a 360 tracking shot visual of everything happening in the courtyard. Astoundingly good.

@nlj: This is an amazing feat of television directing, editing and cinematography.

@donaldjr: Wow. That continuous shot!

@thatone_girl07: This music and this continuous shot omfg this is beautifully done bye

@cam_diesel: The musical variations this week have been giving me LIFE. Such great scoring to this whole episode.

@ZombieTullos: #GameOfThrones is so badass!

@mefernandes: OMFG tonight

@marcelocordova: THIS BATTLE IS AWESOME!!

@Sir_Davidio: This fight is hard to watch when I’m rooting for people on both sides

@b_phil10: I’m on the edge of my freaking seat right now

@Handsome_Jake_: The Nights Watch could really use Karl Tanner right now

@AngryGoTFan: YOU CANT CUT DEAF DICK FOLLARD AND SAY ITS THE BATTLE OF CASTLE BLACK!!!!!!!! #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@Gabi_RT: On a scale from 1 to f*cking doomed, how bad is the Night’s Watch doing?

11.

So Sam has ONE JOB…

He does it pretty well!

@CherylMcinnis58: GHOST!

@feellikepdiddy: GHOOOOOOOST!!!

@HotelFoxtrot: GHOST FTW!!

@aerynsunx: GHOST! GHOST! GHOST!!

@Handsome_Jake_: WE NEED YA BOY

@cam_diesel: DIREWOLVES #BYKE!!!!!!!

@theSamwellTarly: Oh yes Ghost cam amazing.

@lmjd: If they kill Ghost I will be pissed.

Ghost did the killing.

@AngryGoTFan: WHEN GHOST FIRST ATTACKED IT LOOKED LIKE SOMEONE THREW A STUFFED ANIMAL AT THE TV #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

LOST references will always be reblogged.

@AngryGoTFan: THE RABBIT IN MONTY PYTHON WAS BETTER VFX THAN GHOST #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

“Look at the boooones!”

@GameOverRos: And Ghost just earned his treats tonight.

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Jon locks blades with Styr, who seems nine times bigger and stronger.

@mrbauchy: Omg this battle is getting intense

@The8thchamber: Jon Snow!!!!!

@ShantaFabulous: *SCREAMS* #DemThrones

Ygritte watches the battle between the two, taking time to occasionally pick off passing Crows.

@Sincerely_Shey: And then there’s this bitch. #ygritte

@BeautyBrienne: Yggy Yggy Yggy. My girl. @YgrittetheWild

@BigDamnHerosSir: Uh, Jon. Don’t look now, but Ygritte’s looking at you. Welcome to Fucked Town, population: you.

@ShantaFabulous: Kill him Jon! Kill Styr! #DemThrones

Styr smashes Jon’s face into an anvil…

@WiCThoros: Jon snow’s Face Meet Anvil….Anvil meet Jon Snow’s Face… #TheWatchersonTheWall #ouch

… throws him across a lit forge, and seems to have the upper hand when–

@jdarico: Hammer time?

@marcelocordova: Hammer time!

@Henry_Butz: Stop…hammer time

@ShantaFabulous: Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #DemThrones

@RebekahNolan: Look, a hammer to the brain is good, but it’s no eyeball melon-brain skull smash.

@BigDamnHerosSir: Wee little hammer in his skull, down goes the Thenn. Smashed face in an anvil? Jon’s fine.

@Tyrion_Halfman: I should have asked Jon Snow to be my champion. #HeKnowsSomething

@BlackGirlNerds: How is Jon Snow’s sexy curly tendrils still in tact? #DemThrones

It’s in the contract!

@ShantaFabulous: I want to pull his hair.

Get in line, Shanta!

@ShantaFabulous: Oberyn is forever #bae though. Hey @PedroPascal1. #heyboo *blows kisses*

@JrMeAtSix: Whole episode of Jon snow and it’s the best EPSIODE

Jon has won…

… but suddenly he’s face-to-face with the ex.

(I’ve been there, people. It’s never good.)

@subtletheory: OH GOD.

@duckandcover: SHIT. OLLY.

@marcelocordova: YGRIIIITTEEE!!!

@cam_diesel: Oh shit. The moment of truth. OH SHIT!!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK !!!!!!! OLLLIE!!!!!!! NOOOOO NOT YGRITTE!!

@HarleyHorcrux: HOW FUCKING DARE YOU HAVE YGRITTE GET SHOT LIKE THAT RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM FUCK THIS FUCK OFF

@tiny_dancer_26: Bye Ygritte

@BlackGirlNerds: Bye Ygritte. #sorrynotsorry

@dou_dc: Thanks, little kid, for saving Jon’s life! Sorry Ygritte, you gotta go. #DemThrones

@Mister_Godzilla: Bon jovi – shot through the heart

@motelsonthemoon: “We are never ever getting back together.” Taylor Jon Snow Swift

@MarlonT9: Fucking Hell!!! Why dat girl had to die now….smh! Sorry John Snow!

@4TruIntentions: He still knowns nothing? typical…

@MsAnnie26: There goes my 2nd #GameOfThrones OTP *cries hard*

@dou_dc: Oh, Jon. Lemme console you … #DemThrones

@eboldy: I almost forgot about Ygritte so naturally I’m crying

@Soulrific: Jon Snow didn’t even get to eat her out one last time.

Criminal.

@Handsome_Jake_: That little dude killing Ygritte and giving Jon the head nod after is so fucking badass

Ol’ Handsome Jake had more to say. He basically went off:

@Handsome_Jake_: When I kill my buddy’s ex I always give him the bro nod after

@Handsome_Jake_: Crows before hoes

@Handsome_Jake_: Best shot in your village?? More like best shot out of the whole damn Nights Watch. He put it through her heart.

@Handsome_Jake_: Somewhere a feminist is writing an article about how Olly nodding his head after killing Ygritte was sexist.

@Handsome_Jake_: Olly should check his white male privilege tbh

@Handsome_Jake_: Olly only killed Ygritte so she couldn’t tell Jon she was pregnant with Olly’s child.

@Handsome_Jake_: If only Jon Snow had put Olly in the tunnel. That giant would have been in big trouble.

@Handsome_Jake_: Here we see Olly bathing in the blood of his fallen enemies:

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Handsome Jake is mental. He belongs here, with us.

@undomiiel: FUCK YES THAT LITTLE KID IS SO METAL

@duckandcover: Olly for Lord Commander of the Night’s Watch.

@7373tinkerbell: Haha bitch you killed my dad fuck you

@aerynsunx: Kid: Look I killed someone. Jon: Seven Hells.

@robertcyoung: Ygritte went down like Omar #DemThrones

@Handsome_Jake_: I actually like Yrgritte. Yeah she killed people. Who cares? They were lifelong enemies. Tormund does this too and we all love him

@alexandria_bks: #GameOfThrones has me in here crying like a little bitch.

@thomaspashko: Forget The Fault in Our Stars. I’m crying at #GameOfThrones right now

@caseykassidy: Ygritte will get no love from me. I’m glad she’s dead.

@alexandria_bks: #GameOfThrones has me in here crying like a little bitch.

@HarleyHorcrux: THEY KEPT IN THAT PART IM SO HAPPY BUT IM SOBBING MY EYES OUT

@JonSnowBastrd: Damn, even Ygritte’s last words to me is; “You know nothing, Jon Snow.”

Canon.

@YgrittetheWild: Party in the Night Lands, but he better burn my body.

@JonSnowBastrd: The only girl I liked better than my own hair. #RIPYgritte

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@duckandcover: It’s okay, guys. Ygritte’s reincarnated, becomes a maid for Lord Grantham, and then becomes a secretary. #DowntonAbbey

Good to know we have a singular timespace continuum!

So up on the Wall, Dolorous Edd unleashes the fatal frozen fury of… the SCYTHE.

@GameOverRos: HOLY SHIT! THE SCYTHE!

@GusAndLeo: Hoooooooly shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii…… #DROPTHESCYTHE

@theSamwellTarly: Wall anchor it the best thing ever.

@CitizenoftheW: They should let Ed be in charge more often.

@thatone_girl07: Weight loss, Wall edition

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Here is the musical version.

@ThrilledGoTFan: THE CLIMB IS ALL THERE IS

@mherr1979: Dolorous Edd, Ray of Sunshine.

@undomiiel: dolorous edd is the prince that was promised

@fraser_henry_: Edd is the Prince that was Promised. The Lightbringer. Eddzor Ahai.

Looks like the day is won. The wildlings have had enough for tonight.

@8beaver: Castle Black will stand to watch another day….

@LeNoirAuteur: how many people in the night’s watch now? like 12?

Close to.

Jon takes a still-feisty Tormund Giantsbane prisoner.

@GameOverRos: Oh, Tormund. Like a baited bear. And I WOULD STILL CLIMB HIM!

@undercover_emi: Can’t breathe. Love Tormund too much.

@AngryGoTFan: TORMUND DOESNT GET CAPTURED HE LOVES WITH BEARS!!!! #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

Sam goes to find Gilly… and discovers she has company!

@GameOverRos: Slynt says he’s tough. Slynt says he’s brave. So tell me why Slynt, is shitting in a cave.

@mW_: Slynt sucks.

Slynt sucks.

@cam_diesel: WHAT. HAPPENED. WITH. THE.. GIANT. IN. THE. TUNNEL?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!

@duckandcover: WHERE THE FUCK IS GRENN. I’M INCONSOLABLE.

You’re about to find out.

@Adrienn96807858: I guess that answers the question about the giant in the tunnel

@BriaSoBoojie: OMG!!!!! Not the homies!

@Handsome_Jake_: NO GRENN

@feellikepdiddy: NOT GRENN TOO?!?!

@liz_belcher: WTF? Grenn? Seven Hells No!

@duckandcover: GRENN. GODDAMN IT. I HATE THIS SHOW SO MUCH.

@FatPinkMast: GODDAMNIT, NOT GRENN TOO.

@becca_diane11: What in the hell?!?!?! Grenn’s dead too????

@BigDamnHerosSir: “NO NOT GRENN!” #ThingsIJustYelledInMyLivingRoom #ImNotCryingYoureCrying

@KaytiRobison: Pyp AND Grenn? D&D are worse than GRRM.

@HarleyHorcrux: WHAT THE FUCK IS SHOW EVEN DOING WHY GRENN WHY PYP FUCK THIS IM FUCKING DONE

@annalisa_nicole: Grenn

@BeautyBrienne: Oh Grenn.

@Sir_Davidio: This is worse than Oberyn last week, I can’t you guys, I’m done

@scott4567: Grenn held the gate..*salutes*

@ShantaFabulous: #DemThrones And now his watch has ended.

@cam_diesel: They all died, but they held the gate against the Giant. Noble brothers of the Knight’s Watch. RIP.

@theraputicwhat: Why did #Grenn have to die?! #quietintherealm

@HotelFoxtrot: Maybe it’s sentimentally talking, but Grenn could have gotten it.

@motelsonthemoon: GODDAMN IT GRENN. YOU HAD ONE JOB. AND THAT WAS TO STAY ALIVE. NO THERE IS NO HOT GUYS ON THE WALL BUT HOT MEAT CLEAVER DUDE

@AngryGoTFan: I LITERALLY JUST LIT TEN THOUSAND CANDLES FOR THE TRUE DONAL NOYE #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@Arndt_you_Corey: So many feels! #JonSnow #Ygritte #Pyp They killed Pyp!

@KaytiRobison: Pyp AND Grenn? D&D are worse than GRRM.

@AbedsHappyPlace: I HATE YOU D&D.

THIS IS NO TIME TO PIN THIS ON DUNGEONS & DRAGONS.

Jesus. Feels like the ’70′s all over again.

So Jon had one last mission to attempt:

Time to go try and kill Mance Rayder… but without a sword.

@nucleus22: Of all the Stark children, Jon is the most like Ned and I don’t even believe he is his Dad.

@AranzaHndz: Jon Snow, making dumb decisions since Eddard Stark was alive.

@lmartin1045: #JohnSnow is the man!!

@AndreaSica: Jon Snow is the boss

@pinksunflowuhhs: Jon. Muthafucking. Snow.

@GameOverRos: Jon Snow, you just earned my respect. You did well. Lord Eddard would be so proud.

@Trap_Jesus: JON SNOW IS EVERYTHING ROBB STARK SHOULD’VE BEEN

@HarleyHorcrux: WAS JON SNOW EVEN LIMPING?! WHERE WAS SATAN?!?? DONAL NOYE??? GRENN AND PYP?!!!!!!!

@jennyham41: Love Kit Harington!! #JONSNOW

Hey, between the assault on Craster’s and this epic episode… that final look at Ygritte, when he thought he was a goner… this was Kit’s strongest season.

Which I rightly predicted!

(Thank you. Thank you.)

@taryngolightly: someone tell me why “john snow” and lord farquad are trending i am pissing my pantaloons

John Snow was trending. Imagine how high he’d have trended if they spelled his name right.

Annnnnd…

It ended.

@OneBella10: #GameOfThrones Over already?

@AngelaLMorris: Arrrhgggg!!! Seriously #GoT seriously!?!?

@HarleyHorcrux: THE EPISODE IS OVER??????

@Sir_Davidio: WTF NO IT CAN’T END THERE

@mherr1979: You end it like that?! WHAT IS THIS FUCKERY?!

@cam_diesel: WAIT!!! WHAT ABOUT MY LAST 8 MINUTES, @HBO?!?!?!??!!??! WHAT THE FUCK, DAWG?!?!?!?!?!??

@duckandcover: YOU HAVE SEVEN MORE MINUTES, YOU TWATS WITH MOUTHS.

An… interesting visual.

@alovelydai: George R R Martin doesn’t give a fuck about your fave characters and HBO don’t give a damn about your 60 minutes. #DemThrones

@AngryGoTFan: SO GLAD WE GOT ALL THOSE GREY WORM MISSY SCENES NOW #PAYOFF #RIGHTGUYS #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@matthewttodd: Well that was one of the most thrilling epic hours of television I have ever seen.

@duckandcover: THE LAST TIME I CRIED WAS SEASON 1. I HATE THIS SHOW.

@BeautyBrienne: I don’t want to hear ANY BITCHING about casting budgets, @HBO. NONE. YOU HEAR ME?

@thatone_girl07: I’m sorry but that giant arrow was the best thing I have ever fucking seen

@YEAHitsme16: There’s no way that was an hour…

@aerynsunx: How is the Season Finale to #GameOfThrones not 3 hours long? 10 hours (barely) are not enough to tell this story every year.

@Handsome_Jake_: WHERE IS YOU KNOW WHO

@jimalayah: I’M NOT READY FOR IT TO END!!! I NEED MORE EPISODES!!!

@Handsome_Jake_: I can’t wait another fucking week. Been waiting 5 goddamn years

@BigDamnHerosSir: I’m so glad @HBO fucked us out of 8 min of @GameOfThrones so we can watch HBO ads. Really making a compelling argument against piracy, guys.

@aerynsunx: That episode zoomed by so fast it felt like 15 minutes.

@laurenbradeen: This #GameOfThrones episode is giving me more anxiety than I imagine child birth will #GoT #wildings

@T_Jemplin: HOLY FUCK THAT EPISODE THO SKLJHDFKJSDVNK

@tommygallen: That was awesome

@BigDamnHerosSir: … grenn, tho… :-(

@GameOverRos: That was like an hour of the best battle scene from Lord of the Rings. It was AMAZING!

@AcornMan123: it should’ve been 2 hours honestly

@NickBrehmer: An entire episode on castle black. Amazing and painful at the same time.

@JakeKock: That episode of Game of Thrones.

@RobbieBowen: Episode 9 of #GameOfThrones did not disappoint again.

@reyesskristine: Emotionally exhausted from #GameOfThrones. Had to pause 3 times during the episode to calm down. I AM NOT CALM.

@thatone_girl07: Okay so changes really suck and I’m super annoyed but can we discuss how glorious that battle was shot and the music and omfg

@Handsome_Jake_: The best three episodes are probably Blackwater, Red Wedding and Watcher on the Wall and all 3 of them have no Dany

@_GodsNephew: The defense of #TheWall in #gameofthrones is tighter than…

@SamSpratt: A TV show just pulled off a battle scene better than any 200+ million dollar budget movie ever has.

@StefMercedes: I swear I felt like I was going to barf this whole episode.

@DustenCarlson: I mean … is the episode REALLY over? None of my favorite characters are dead …

What, four quality cast members isn’t enough for your cold, black heart?!

@HarleyHorcrux: WHAT THE FUCK IS SHOW EVEN DOING WHY GRENN WHY PYP FUCK THIS IM FUCKING DONE

Harley will be back next week. At least in moral support of Taryn.

@angelbooky: Snowman is hot! Need more thrones. Season 4 ending too quickly.

@tc_reynolds: Need to change shirts after that ep of #GameOfThrones #sweating

@KyleLovesTV: That episode was Jon Snow basically doing a 60-minute Free Bird guitar solo

Kit crushed it.

What did Winter-Is-Coming’s fearless creator think?

@p_Red: Now THAT was a fantastic episode of #GameofThrones. #NeilMarshallDaGod

Damn skippy.

@WiCThoros: One of my favorite shots of the entire series is the one continuous shot during the battle of Castle Black

@Dandelionx: At least the scene was pretty much like in the books. The talking about the cave and the “You know nothing, Jon Snow.”

@motelsonthemoon: “So we have successfully killed off the hottest male characters at the wall. You’re welcome Kit Harrington.” David and Dan

I refuse to believe Three-Finger Hobb is dead.

@lyndseyhewittt: Very sad Ygritte is gone. One of my favorite characters, for sure.

@curlycasualista: Also, HOW AM I EXPECTED TO WAIT A YEAR FOR THE NEXT SEASON OF #GameofThrones AFTER NEXT SUNDAY??

We are all asking ourselves this question!

@thatone_girl07: The music was right, the panning, the lighting, that fight choreography; it was so well done. Like dayum those workers need a raise

@ATLGreg1: Amazing episode. That scene where the camera moves through all of Castle Black was incredible.

They did a couple long pans, the the one 360 birds eye from high up over the central courtyard was Emmy-worthy on its own. Neil Marshall, ladies and gentlemen!

So…casualty count?

@AngryGoTFan: THE LARGEST CASUALTY OF THIS BATTLE WAS THE HOPES AND DREAMS OF ALL THE LONG TERM FANS #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@BreakingBraavos: Relationship status: When Grenn/Pyp has left the world, no ship can replace it

@JonSnowBastrd: Grenn, Pyp and Ygritte. #RIP

@JonSnowBastrd: Moment of silence for the guy that got shot with an arrow by the giant.

What, no tears for Styr, Magnar of Thenn?

@AngryGoTFan: GRENN AND PYP1?!?!?!??! ?0IETR0WEJHF08WEFGNUWIEF083R083F8WNHEGI8WJEG09J0W9JG09SJGWQSFSWF3535QFWDFADGFSRG43535434

@WiCThoros: Ser Allister killed Grenn Not Jon Snow! #shouldasealedthetunnel #RIPGrenn I’m pissed about this one. He was my favorite Brother.

@taryngolightly: SOMEONE TELL ME IF DOLOROUS EDD IS ALIVE NOW

@aerynsunx: Thank you, Rose Leslie, for fulfilling every woman’s dream at the end of a relationship; by getting the last word.

@wall_jules: Why are you killing off characters that lived in the books?

‏@motelsonthemoon: Stannis was great this episode.

@Grizzlei: Is Jon Snow the king yet?

Not yet!

@taryngolightly: i hate ygritte and jon/ygritte so i felt nothing but my mom cried and i was like AM I HEARTLESS

@taryngolightly: BUT I KNOW IM NOT HEARTLESS BECAUSE I ACTUALLY GOT REALLY SAD OVER PYP AND GRENN AND I DONT REALLY CARE ABOUT THEM IN THE BOOKS

@AngryGoTFan: I LOOK BACK AT THOSE PEOPLE WHO THOUGHT ROS WAS THE BIGGEST CHANGE FROM THE BOOKS AND THINK OH YOU SWEET SUMMER CHILDREN #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

@theSamwellTarly: I’m so glad I did not set Castle Black on fire… all those dry, papery scrolls next to the open flame…

@kateereplied: I feel emotionally drained.

@vivcrespo: Thanks Jon Snow, you didn’t die in this episode.

@motelsonthemoon: “Mom, you don’t understand. Dolorous Edd and Hot Meat Cleaver dude are the only hotties left at Castle Black.”

Even Pyp’s actor, Josef Altin was shocked by the death!

Well, at least he was a year ago:

@JosefAltin: I was reading the season 4 script whilst filming for child 44 & when I got to that bit I was like… NOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Do I come back! Noooo!!

We’ll miss Pyp! But you can catch Josef in The Hooligan Factory, in theaters in the UK right about now-ish.

@AdrianneCurry: Thank you, @GameOfThrones ….thank you for bringing to life that which I hold so dear…

Amen.

So! Next week!

@BigDamnHerosSir: I hope Mance’s parlay is “BRO, WE JUST WANT TO GET AWAY FROM THE MOTHERFUCKING ICE ZOMBIES.” Someone’s gotta say it.

@Handsome_Jake_: Like next episode will have like 5 game changing moments and that will distract from what happens on the wall

@austin_apple: So #GameOfThrones is going to be insane next week…

@WiCThoros: I want to know who Aemon’s lady friend was…

Who knows if we’ll ever know?

I got a clue sent to me though…

Bpv-ljCCQAEyW7G.jpg-large

@caseykassidy: I have no idea how they are going to pack so much into next week’s show that we can wrap up in 1 hour.

Well at least we KNOW we’re getting Mance next week!

@WiC_Fury: So does #GameofThrones have to pay Ciaran Hinds by the hour now, is that what the problem is…?

@Ser_Pounce: Next ep is the longest yet, and it looks like they’ll have to fill every minute of it

@taryngolightly: OK GUYS MAYBE SANDOR WONT ACTUALLY FIGHT BRIENNE MAYBE THEY WILL BECOME FRIENDS LOL

@taryngolightly: CLEGANEBOWL OR RIOT

I… do not think we are getting Cleganebowl next week.

If ever.

But hey! You never know!

Seeya then!


64 Comments

  1. Redjoyish
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:38 am | Permalink

    Asha Greyjoy!

  2. heyjulieann
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:51 am | Permalink

    @feellikepdiddy: “THE DAY WILL COME WHEN THE COURAGE OF MEN FAILS, BUT IT IS NOT THIS DAY! THIS IS THE—” *receives note* — oh. This ISNT Helm’s Deep?

    & me screaming “FORTH EORLINGAS!!!” in my living room.

  3. Veltigar
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:19 am | Permalink

    @AngryGoTFan: SO GLAD WE GOT ALL THOSE GREY WORM MISSY SCENES NOW #PAYOFF #RIGHTGUYS #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

    The truth!

    @AngryGoTFan: THE LARGEST CASUALTY OF THIS BATTLE WAS THE HOPES AND DREAMS OF ALL THE LONG TERM FANS #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

    Agreed as well.

    Lord General Cornwallis: Their names and ranks?
    Benjamin Martin: They refuse to give me their names, but the ranks are nine lieutenants, five captains, three majors, and one very fat colonel who called me a… “cheeky fellow.” Oh, and they all wanted me to cast Mads Mikkelsen as Euron

  4. Shock Me
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:30 am | Permalink

    I would have liked to Grenn and his men’s final desperate struggle in the tunnel. Maybe about three minutes around the time Tormund was still fighting so that those in the courtyard could still be under threat without knowing it and thinking the worst was over. I was rather cross no one looked for Grenn as soon as Tormund was captured.

    Grenn (Mark Stanley) you rocked that episode.

  5. Little Bird
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:30 am | Permalink

    Amazing, I really enjoy this =) thank you guys

  6. BeautyBrienne
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:35 am | Permalink

    I still better get to eat my Goddamn ears next week.

  7. Fire And Blood
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:37 am | Permalink

    BeautyBrienne,

    If it’s who I think it is, it’ll only be one ear.

  8. Wodja
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:15 am | Permalink

    Love the tweets, as always!
    The reviews were kinda mixed for this episode. I think I agree with the strong points and the weaker ones pointed out. It was a major feat of television, action packed with still enough time left to get the “feels” going (Sam and Jon, Sam and Gilly, Maester Aemon, etc.) Music was great as always and the actors all did an A job. Problem is – the whole season didn’t manage to get people invested enough in the Night’s watchmen for them to care enough (not even about Grenn and Pyp). Jon and Ygritte also had so little time together that probably not that many people cared about her enough. Book-readers will probably feel differently but for non-readers this is what I gather (I have read the books btw). Also – after the last episode a lot of people just want to know what happens to Tyrion. And then there are a dozen other plot lines. I think the last episode will be the biggest highlight of the season, where in past seasons it has traditionally been episode 9 (although in S1 we did get the birth of the dragons!)

  9. SerKenjiGerrard
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:30 am | Permalink

    I NEED Peter Dinklage’s shirt, like, NOW…!!! Awesome work as always FaB…
    Also, “@BigDamnHerosSir: I hope Mance’s parlay is “BRO, WE JUST WANT TO GET AWAY FROM THE MOTHERFUCKING ICE ZOMBIES.” Someone’s gotta say it.”

  10. Lady Wolfsbane
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:41 am | Permalink

    Ahhh… from several Monty Python references, to Sesame Street, to Dodgeball – very entertaining. Now though, I am reminded how many hotties we have lost for the ladies… I do hope they keep that cleaver dude, if he’s Three fingers or not…

    Am I crazy… but could the 360 shot be turned into a loop for a screensaver or something? Wouldn’t that be epic?

  11. Zack
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:47 am | Permalink

    Love that Attack on Titan art :D

  12. Myk
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:48 am | Permalink

    LOL I enjoy all of these. Except for that Angry GOT Clown. I skip his pointless crying.

  13. jentario
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:59 am | Permalink

    Great twitter recap, as always!
    And I am 90% sure that the whole JonXManxe scene and STANNIS! STANNIS! STANNIS!!! was meant to appear here but was delayed into episode 10. We know for fact that Moat Cailin was originally meant to be in episode 10. I guess the Hound’s fight scene was probably originally in 8 instead of the Moat. So for those bitching about the ending, it might have been that they couldn’t finish the post-production of the Stannis scene on time…

  14. Ours is the Fury
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:08 am | Permalink

    jentario,

    We don’t know that for a fact. The IMDB credit for Kenning in ep 10 was entirely fan-entered, based on the fact that he was credited on his CV for an Alex Graves episode. So people assumed it would be episode 10, but it was ep 8, another Graves ep.

  15. zambi76
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:22 am | Permalink

    Oh shit Aemon is Jon Snow’s dad. A + L = J amirite?

    Aemon/Lyanna. That’s just a 50-60 years age difference, but hey at least she isn’t his sister.

    No, Aemon/Olenna doesn’t fly either. Still a 20-40 year age difference.

    /crusher of dreams

  16. Alice
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:23 am | Permalink

    Ours is the Fury:
    jentario,

    We don’t know that for a fact. The IMDB credit for Kenning in ep 10 was entirely fan-entered, based on the fact that he was credited on his CV for an Alex Graves episode. So people assumed it would be episode 10, but it was ep 8, another Graves ep.

    What we know for a fact is that TWOTW went from 57 minutes long to 51 minutes long on the official HBO website, in the span of two weeks. So, yeah, jentario has a point. I hope you will give me a medal when you realize next week that the Jon resolution scene will take 6 minutes exactly.

  17. Veltigar
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:33 am | Permalink

    zambi76: Aemon/Lyanna. That’s just a 50-60 years age difference, but hey at least she isn’t his sister.

    No, Aemon/Olenna doesn’t fly either. Still a 20-40 year age difference.

    /crusher of dreams

    Do we know how old Aemon is on the show? I think that, by omitting Jaeherys II from showcanon, they could be the right age for one another.

    Nick Naylor: That’s the beauty of argument, if you argue correctly and support Mads Mikkelsen as Euron, you’re never wrong.

  18. Ms. D. Ranged in AZ
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:44 am | Permalink

    Thanks for the Tweet Roundup FaB and Rabbit!

    @AngryGoTFan: NO AEMON SISTERS DONT COUNT BRAH #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS

    Now THAT made me laugh

    “Life’s a piece of shit, when you look it. Always looks on the bright side of of life! /whistling”

    Dammit, thanks for the earworm! I always end up with Monty Python references in my GOT recap/review videos. Is it the British accents or the fact that it’s a “medieval” setting? Nah, probably because I’m a nerd and watched far too much Python in my youth.

    And if anyone ever calls me a “Ginger minge” they’re gonna get my fist in their gob so they’ll never be able to pronounce the g or m sounds again. Just sayin….

  19. Ms. D. Ranged in AZ
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:59 am | Permalink

    Veltigar,

    Do we know how old Aemon is on the show?

    I believe they said that he was over a 100…or maybe I’m getting it confused with the books. Anyone know? It occurred to me that he could be Jon’s father but then I did the math and that would have made him the father at 80…so no that didn’t make sense. Still, does anyone believe that Jon isn’t a Targaryan? In which case, Aemon is, what? Jon’s great-uncle? If he only knew before he sends Aemon away, he would feel comfort that someone in his family still lives…at least for a little while anyway.

  20. Zack Luye
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:08 pm | Permalink

    Fab work fab, best tweets in the west

  21. fuelpagan
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:14 pm | Permalink

    zambi76: No, Aemon/Olenna doesn’t fly either. Still a 20-40 year age difference.

    So under this logic, the Jon Arryn/Lysa Tully marriage was a figment of my imagination.

    The age difference could have been the reason Olenna didn’t like the match.

  22. Veltigar
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:20 pm | Permalink

    Ms. D. Ranged in AZ:
    Veltigar,

    I believe they said that he was over a 100…or maybe I’m getting it confused with the books.Anyone know?It occurred to me that he could be Jon’s father but then I did the math and that would have made him the father at 80…so no that didn’t make sense.Still, does anyone believe that Jon isn’t a Targaryan?In which case, Aemon is, what?Jon’s great-uncle?If he only knew before he sends Aemon away, he would feel comfort that someone in his family still lives…at least for a little while anyway.

    I think that’s from the books. Can’t imagine them giving enough screentime to Aemon to say he’s a hundred.

    I think Aemon and Olenna is a thing. In the books it’s probably Prince Duncan that spurned her.

    fuelpagan: So under this logic, the Jon Arryn/Lysa Tully marriage was a figment of my imagination.

    The age difference could have been the reason Olenna didn’t like the match.

    More like he wanted to become a maester. Olenna might think she’s very good, but she got dumped and therefore went for the next best thing, a Tyrell.

    That’s more than likely how it went in the books anyway.

    Jordan Belfort: On a daily basis I consume enough drugs to sedate Manhattan, Long Island, and Queens for a month. I take Quaaludes 10-15 times a day for my “back pain”, Adderall to stay focused, Xanax to take the edge off, pot to mellow me out, cocaine to wake me back up again, and casting Mads Mikkelsen as Euron… Well, because it’s awesome.

  23. Fat 'n' Balda
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:43 pm | Permalink

    Hound gonna lose an ear???

  24. Roger König
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:46 pm | Permalink

    Fire And Blood,

    So i guess, you’ve never seen Josef Altins death in Misfits? (Hint: Its in the first episode!)

    I searched for a youtube-video of it, but didnt found any.. (well ok its off-screen, but it doesnt look good from what we see) ^^

  25. Greatjon of Slumber
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 12:52 pm | Permalink

    zambi76: Aemon/Lyanna. That’s just a 50-60 years age difference, but hey at least she isn’t his sister.

    No, Aemon/Olenna doesn’t fly either. Still a 20-40 year age difference.

    /crusher of dreams

    Yeah, but it’s totally Aemon/Old Nan, right? A + O = Hodor!

  26. zambi76
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 1:04 pm | Permalink

    Do we know how old Aemon is on the show? I think that, by omitting Jaeherys II from showcanon, they could be the right age for one another.

    Even if we go by the actors ages 75 and 91 it’s still a strech, especially if Aemon remembers a fondly love story and Olenna a mousy icky Targaryen. Yes, one generation was skiped by the show, but not two and there are two generations between them in the books. Actually this means on the show a Olenna/Mad King match would be more likely than in the books, where she (born between 230-238 AL) is probably a bit too old for Aerys (born in 243 AL).

    Yeah, but it’s totally Aemon/Old Nan, right? A + O = Hodor!

    Well, many people think Dunk was his great-grand-daddy (and Brienne’s).

  27. zambi76
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 1:25 pm | Permalink

    I’m just puzzled why people want to construct another totally fucked up pairing with Olenna/Aemon (ASOIAF/GOT not reached your quota yet?) instead of leaving the poor old sap alone with his fond memories of a young love.

    I personally think Olenna’s Targ was Aerions (not considered for throne) son in the books if you want fucked-up-ness. Well, or Aegons V mysterious third son, but not Duncan the Small that would be cheesy.

  28. xSyDx
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 1:53 pm | Permalink

    This is like…the best post ever.

    Naah, next week will be better. Thank you. I’ll wait for the AxeyFabolous on youtube this week!

  29. mariamb
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 2:21 pm | Permalink

    Great post as usual.

    But I love that shot of our 5 brothers titled “We Are the Watchers on the Wall.” That needs to be a poster!

  30. fuelpagan
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 2:23 pm | Permalink

    Veltigar: More like he wanted to become a maester. Olenna might think she’s very good, but she got dumped and therefore went for the next best thing, a Tyrell.

    It’s pretty clear in the books Olenna didn’t want the Targaryen match. Now that I think about it…Aemon was already a maester in the books that would prevent any marriage. But that doesn’t mean Olenna and Aemon didn’t love each other and she chose a Tyrell over marrying a Targ that wasn’t Aemon.

  31. Matryoshka core
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 2:32 pm | Permalink

    It’s just a fundamental need to tie loose ends. Why did people ship Olenna with Tywin? Because they were there, that’s why. Same here.

  32. sifuskum
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 2:45 pm | Permalink

    @AngryGoTFan says” Blahblah blah is different from the book. Waawaa. I’m crying and SCREAMING about it b/c it makes me soooo sad ;(”

    Why do you still publish these tweets. He’s never been clever or informative. He never offers constructive arguments. And he’s even been inaccurate concerning book knowledge. These tweets can be spoilery for Unsullied and, for the rest of us, we know when the show is different…… don’t need some idiot SCREAMING and whining about it.

  33. SHMF
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:07 pm | Permalink

    AngryGoTfan is now just an annoying attention whore. used to be funny. In fact a lot of these tweets have gone from really funny in seasons 2/3 to a bunch of people focusing more on twitter and getting their tweets posted than actually caring about the show. Sad, these twitter recaps used to be my favorite.

  34. SHMF
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:10 pm | Permalink

    You should do a weekly recap boycotting @AngryGOTFan, @motelsonthemoon, and @BeautyBrienne just to force them to actually watch the episode.

  35. Veltigar
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:11 pm | Permalink

    fuelpagan: It’s pretty clear in the books Olenna didn’t want the Targaryen match. Now that I think about it…Aemon was already a maester in the books that would prevent any marriage. But that doesn’t mean Olenna and Aemon didn’t love each other and she chose a Tyrell over marrying a Targ that wasn’t Aemon.

    Lol, no. The wording in Olenna’s speech about marrying a Targ can be interpreted in the way you say, but you can also interpret it as Olenna lying about it because the Targaryen in question wounded her pride. Since all three of Aegon’s sons broke their engagements to marry for love and they are the only Targaryens in the right age brackets (Aerion’s son is unlikely for certain other reasons), she must have been one of the scourned women.

    Ergo she, the proud Olenna, says she was the one who made the choice. Personally, I’d say Duncan was the one that dumped her. He would not have liked the Tyrells glitter and glamour approach (he was very much the son of his father) for one thing. Furthermore the Redwyne’s are the most powerful fleet house in Westeros (Greyjoy’s control more ships, but they have to rely on their underlings), given the whole trouble with the BF’s it would make sense for Egg to marry his heir to the Redwynes.

    If you can prevent the BF’s from crossing, you don’t have much trouble. An added advantage to the Redwynes is that they are loaded and could easily invade the Reach if things go really wrong (the Reach was the region that fielded the biggest support for the Blackfyres).

    It would also put another layer to Olenna herself. Her goal of making her granddaughter queen could then be seen as a bid by old Olly to lay claim on a position she feels is rightly hers.

    Patrick Denham: Let me give you some legal advice: Shut the fuck up and cast Mads Mikkelsen as Euron!

  36. Harrold Hardyng
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:20 pm | Permalink

    The dire wolves have been handled so poorly. Ghost being captured by the mutineers and not coming to Jon’s defense after having his head smashed off of an anvil by Styr…why are the dire wolves so weak in the show? Truly, D&D do not understand. I feel angrygotfan’s pain.

  37. Thoros
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:35 pm | Permalink

    do i get a gold star or something? :)

    Great recap bruh!

  38. Insomnia333
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:42 pm | Permalink

    Loved the Twitter recap as usual.

    I don’t understand why people are giving Jon crap for leaving Longclaw behind. His sword is going to be the first thing they take from him when he gets captured, unless he’s planning to cut his way through the wildlings to Mance.

  39. Jen@House Stark
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:45 pm | Permalink

    Dear FaB: Is it really sick that House Stark and I were laughing our behinds off while the crow was flying through the air from the huge arrow? Lolol

  40. Veltigar
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 3:57 pm | Permalink

    Insomnia333:
    Loved the Twitter recap as usual.

    I don’t understand why people are giving Jon crap for leaving Longclaw behind.His sword is going to be the first thing they take from him when he gets captured, unless he’s planning to cut his way through the wildlings to Mance.

    … People give Jon shit for leaving Longclaw without taking another weapon. A stashed dagger or something, anything would have sufficed. Just bad writing.

    Harrold Hardyng:
    The dire wolves have been handled so poorly. Ghost being captured by the mutineers and not coming to Jon’s defense after having his head smashed off of an anvil by Styr…why are the dire wolves so weak in the show? Truly, D&D do not understand. I feel angrygotfan’s pain.

    Agreed

    Pumbaa: [about "Casting Mads Mikkelsen as Euron"] It’s our motto.
    Young Simba: What’s a motto?
    Timon: Nothing. What’s a motto with you?
    [laughs]

  41. Game Over Ros
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 5:02 pm | Permalink

    My thanks for including my tweets. Especially the ‘Slynt in a cave’ one. Mighty proud of that.

    I’ve noticed a lot of comments on here about the live tweeters focussing more on their tweets than the episode. I can assure you, I watch the episode. I just happen to enjoy sharing my reaction to what I’m watching.

    Yeah, I’m one of those who like to talk during films. That’s why I don’t go to the cinema, and watch Thrones alone.

    And now I have ‘Always Look On The Bright Side…’ in my head. Cheers!

  42. AngryGoTFan
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 5:28 pm | Permalink

    那个家伙是谁只有尖叫有关的书籍需要得到自己阉割,捂着嘴!老实说,我觉得他有点已经成长为酸的葡萄,他不断抱怨!

  43. AngryGoTFan
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 5:29 pm | Permalink

    Game Over Ros,

    PLUS YOUR A BOOK CHARACTER!

  44. spacechampion
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 7:02 pm | Permalink

    Harrold Hardyng:
    The dire wolves have been handled so poorly.

    Would have been nice to get a sequence where Jon and Ghost are fighting side by side: Jon kills one, Ghost kills one, Jon kills one, Ghost kills one etc. Probably wouldn’t have added anything to the story though.

    Last we saw Ghost he was chewing on that Thenn. He probably still is. I think he got distracted by dinner.

  45. Fevredream
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:26 pm | Permalink

    Myk,

    It’s very obviously a joke account. Calm down.

  46. Fevredream
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:32 pm | Permalink

    AngryGoTFan,

    いや、彼は明らかに冗談のためのアカウントだろう?まあ、僕にとっては彼が超面白いけどな。そう思わない?
    とにかく、中国語は読みにくいね。

  47. gisizzlah
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:41 pm | Permalink

    Wrecking ball FTW!!!!

  48. Turri
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    If Sandor doesn’t die unambiguously, CLEGANEBOWL is fucking confirmed

  49. Michelle
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:52 pm | Permalink

    LOL some of you haven’t yet figured out that AngryGotFan is a parody account? It’s so very obviously mocking the extreme purists who actually do bitch & moan at every little thing. That’s why it’s so whiny with the #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS. It’s meant to sound like the most insufferable of the purists.

  50. BeautyBrienne
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 9:57 pm | Permalink

    Fire And Blood,

    Mmm. I bet it’s bacony.

  51. BeautyBrienne
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:03 pm | Permalink

    SHMF,

    I can guarantee you that I watch the show. If you don’t find the recaps funny anymore no one’s forcing you to read them.

  52. PatD
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 10:11 pm | Permalink

    Seriously. I love his posts. The TweetCaps just wouldn’t be right without PACO, I mean AngryGoTFan.

    Has anyone ever asked the cast & crew if they read/follow this feature every Wednesday after each episode? You know they do, and if I were interviewing them, I’d ask what were their favorites. This has become such an integral part to the viewing experience that I can’t imagine the show without these tweets.

  53. Fire And Blood
    Posted June 11, 2014 at 11:24 pm | Permalink

    PatD,

    We know a portion of the cast does love the Twitter posts. (I was told at least 5 or 6 read them religiously, but who really knows?) David and Dan used to read these as well, though of late they have stated they don’t really read reviews or fan sites any more. Too bad! These tweets are a riot. I imagine they’d brighten up even the most dreary Belfast days.

    (I’m just glad I was able to subliminally suggest Dorne and a kick-ass Red Viper so successfully last year.)

    (What.)

  54. PatD
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 12:49 am | Permalink

    Honestly, I get them not reading the reviews and criticism after 4 seasons, but the TweetCaps??? Nah. No way they could resist.

    To all those who contribute to this every week: thanks! and keep those tweets comin’.

  55. 5mash
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 4:19 am | Permalink

    You guys just don’t understand @AngryGoTFan’s ART.

  56. duckandcover
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 6:41 am | Permalink

    Hey! “Twats with mouths” was Alliser the Bae’s description of the Night’s Watch that episode. I was being topical.

  57. duckandcover
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 6:46 am | Permalink

    SHMF,

    I haven’t really noticed a downgrade in the quality of tweets. Even before WiC was covering these (or before it was really popular as the seasons went on), there was a pretty large live-tweeting community on Twitter for GOT. That’s how I became aware of this: Axechucker @’d me one day and said that he’d included some of my tweets in an article (I think this was back in S2 or S3?) and I was like, “Whoa, people pay attention to that?” I was just doing it as something to do during the episodes, since I tend to watch them two or three times on Sundays.

  58. lol
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 12:45 pm | Permalink

    AngryGOTFan is just your average sketch comedy catchphrase character and about as funny.

    I WANNA DIP MY BALLS IN IT.

  59. lol
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 12:57 pm | Permalink

    Michelle:
    LOL some of you haven’t yet figured out that AngryGotFan is a parody account? It’s so very obviously mocking the extreme purists who actually do bitch & moan at every little thing. That’s why it’s so whiny with the #NOONEUNDERSTAAANDS. It’s meant to sound like the most insufferable of the purists.

    No shit it’s a parody account. People hate AngryGOTFan because he’s a painfully unfunny one trick pony. There’s nothing clever or interesting about any of the tweets. They’re certainly not anywhere as absurd as actual hysterical bookbeards freaking out about every change and how D&D is raping their childhood memories. Quote some of those people for a change instead of a watered-down wannabe “parody”.

    People read these recaps for *actual* reactions to the episode, not to see the same person tell the same stale joke 500 times in a row. But he’s friends with the mods so we’re just going to have to deal with it I guess.

  60. fuelpagan
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 1:44 pm | Permalink

    duckandcover: Even before WiC was covering these…

    That time doesn’t exist. FaBio has been doing these posts since the very beginning. :)

  61. Swordpen
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 5:51 pm | Permalink

    The battle was amazing!!!!!

    So sad that Pyp and Grenn are dead though. :( Oh well… they are still alive in the books.

    http://tiny-tran.blogspot.ca/2014/06/crystal-clay-game-of-thrones-part-10.html

  62. Clegane Puppy
    Posted June 12, 2014 at 10:40 pm | Permalink

    Correct response to the “Fetchez la vache” tweet:

    “Fetchez la poulet!” -The Hound

  63. James`
    Posted June 13, 2014 at 12:31 am | Permalink

    Good stuff!

  64. Hailey
    Posted June 13, 2014 at 12:32 am | Permalink

    look forward to this every week


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