Image: Suicide Squad/Warner Bros
Superheroes fight supervillains: it is known. But with many superhero movies out there, not every fight is a winner. And some are downright dire.
Superheroes have been dominating the box office for several years now, and were major players before that. It seems like every year there’s a new superhero (or better, yet a team of them) that monopolizes our attention, breaking records and kicking butt.
The Marvel Cinematic Universe is king of this space, but it has a lot of competition. Let’s not forget about the past two decades of X-Men movies, the DC Extended Universe, years of Batman films, or the original Superman movies. There’s are superhero movies for every season.
And of course, with superhero movies come superhero action sequences, where our heroes — aided by the best special effects of the day — show off their skills against the villain(s). These fight scenes can make or break a movie. Sometimes they’re be breathtaking, but on more than a few occasions they can be cringey, boring or totally nonsensical.
From Hulk taking on a mutant poodle to Superman fighting Nuclear Man (on land and in space), let’s take a tour of the genre’s most dire action sequences!
Daredevil vs. Bullseye — Daredevil, 2003
Before Ben Affleck donned the iconic Batsuit in Batman v Superman and Justice League, he played the blind superhero Matt Murdock, aka Daredevil, in the 2003 movie of the same name.
If you been meaning to watch this movie but haven’t yet, I don’t know why, because it’s not very good. It’s a much darker take on the superhero story than, say, Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy, which came out around the same time, but the execution is wide of the mark.
That’s never more clear than in Daredevil’s fight scene with Bullseye (Colin Farrell), who has the power to chuck things at people and never miss. He misses a lot when facing off against Daredevil. There’s very little tension; at no point does the audience actually fear that Murdock will lose his life. Instead, there’s a couple of cool special effects and acrobatic moves from the duo before Daredevil eventually wins after his opponent has a bullet shot through his hands. Then Daredevil throws him through a stained-glass window.
If you want to see a much more awesome Darevevil against Bullseye fight, you’d be better off reading the comics or watching their fight in the season 3 finale of the Daredevil show on Netflix.
Batman and Robin vs Mr. Freeze — Batman & Robin, 1997
The opening action sequence of Batman & Robin sees the Dark Knight and Boy Wonder take on Mr. Freeze (Arnold Schwarzenegger) as he aims to steal a diamond from Gotham Museum, resulting in a battle that’s so bad it actually comes out the other end and becomes rather enjoyable and funny, so long as you don’t take it too seriously.
Starring George Clooney as Batman and Chris O’Donnell as Robin, the movie centered around the duo — and later Batgirl (Alicia Silverstone) — trying to stop Mr. Freeze and Poison Ivy (Uma Thurman) from taking over Gotham.
The opening battle is filled with as many ice puns as possible, including classic (yet cringey) lines like “I’m afraid my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy” and “What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!” On top of that, the Caped Crusaders also battle a hockey team, fighting clack for clack with hockey sticks.
This film was so bad that it all but ended the Batman movie franchise, which had started with Michael Keaton’s turn as the character in 1989; it would take nearly a decade to recover. Hollywood’s a cold town.
Superman vs. Nuclear Man — Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, 1987
There’s a reason why Christopher Reeve repeatedly said he wasn’t keen on playing Superman again after the third installment in the franchise. The quality of the movies was already going downhill. It cratered in Superman IV: The Quest For Peace, which saw Clark Kent take it upon himself to rid the world of nuclear weapons to keep it safe. That is until nemesis Lex Luthor created Nuclear Man (Mark Pillow), the only being powerful enough to take down the Man of Steel.
#OnThisDay 1983: Christopher Reeve explained why he felt that Superman III should be his last stint as the Man of Steel. pic.twitter.com/ap0SrLIRXv
— BBC Archive (@BBCArchive) July 18, 2020
Superman’s face-off with Nuclear Man was not what anyone wanted for Christopher’s swan song as this iconic character. Not only does Nuclear Man look far too ridiculous to take seriously, but the fight itself is filled with some of the worst CGI you’ll ever see in any superhero movie. I mean, come on, the original Superman movie had better effects when it came out in 1979!
Oh, and it re-uses shots from previous Superman movies. This fight is one for the ages in the worst way.
Fantastic Four vs. Doctor Doom — Fantastic Four, 2015
Not many superhero films release to as much backlash as Josh Trank’s take on the Fantastic Four. Trank’s vision for Marvel’s First Family is much darker than it needs to be, a far cry from the funnier and more light-hearted tone the franchise was famous for. At the time of writing, the movie boasts a pitiful 9% score on Rotten Tomatoes, which tells you almost everything you need to know.
But if you want to know more, the nadir of the experience comes right near the end of the film, when our heroes fight Doctor Doom (Toby Kebbell) in a bland, anticlimactic battle. None of the Fantastic Four get to show off the extent of their powers, everything feels cliche and forgettable, and the darker tone is more embarrassing than edgy.
Hopefully, Disney will make better use of Reed Richards, Johnny Storm, Susan Storm, and Ben Grimm when they’re inevitably introduced into the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Until then, the 2005 movie is still the best choice for some serviceable Fantastic Four action.
Spider-Man vs. Electro — The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 all but ended Sony’s hopes of having its own Spidey-centric movie franchise. The problems in this movie are pretty straightforward: there are pacing issues, there’s too much going on, and there are some bizarre creative decisions.
The final battle itself between Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield) and Electro (Jamie Foxx) uses some spectacular special effects, but it all falls flat. It looks fantastic, especially with all of the web-swinging action, but some strange editing decisions bring it way down. I’m thinking specifically of how Electro fights Spider-Man to the tune of “Itsy Bitsy Spider,” with each new blow another note. It’s a laughable, head-scratching choice for a fight.
Aside from that, we’ve got some awful dialogue throughout the whole new movie, and we can’t forget the divisive decision to kill Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone), which pound home the last nail in the coffin of this would-be franchise. It also doesn’t help that we never had a sequel to round off the trilogy; we’ll be forever left on the sour note of losing Gwen.
Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) vs. Juggernaut — X-Men: The Last Stand, 2006
The X-Men movies have bought us some memorable fight scenes over the years. Unfortunately, when Kitty Pryde (Ellen Page) faced off against Juggernaut (Vinnie Jones) in The Last Stand, it was memorable for the wrong reasons.
There was a time when The Last Stand looked promising. The first two X-Men movies laid the blueprint for the world of superhero films we live in now, so expectations were high for a final showdown between humans and mutants. Instead, it was mostly a milquetoast affair with a couple of real low points thrown in, chief among them the chase between Shadowcat and Juggeranut, who can’t seem to stop hamming it up. “I’m the wrong guy to play hide and seek with.” Cringe. “Do you know who I am? I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!” Meme-based cringe.
Both characters use their powers, but in the least imaginative ways possible. Kitty Pryde runs through walls and Juggernaut smashes them down until she eventually tricks him and escapes. When Kitty finally reaches Jimmy (Leech), he takes away Juggernaut’s ability and he knocks himself out by smashing his head against the wall.
We’ll just pretend to we didn’t see that.
Catwoman vs Laurel Hedare — Catwoman, 2004
It’s hard to pick just one scene from the Halle Berry-led Catwoman movie, but I’ll try. When Catwoman fights against cosmetics mogul Laurel Hedare (Sharon Stone), it’s set up to be an epic face-off, but proves as boring and bland as the rest of the movie, with a few kicks and incredibly unrealistic stunts thrown in to keep you distracted.
The fight is set to the beat of a rock song and features some of the strangest cinematography you’ll ever see. There’s also some rather suspect acting with (of course) a dash of poor dialogue. “Guess what? It’s overtime.” What?
The battle between Catwoman and Laurel is just plain bad, and should be used as an example of how not to do a superhero fight scene. And before we go we have to mention mention how Catwoman, after being beaten senseless, still manages to somehow swing away from a smashed window of a skyscraper where she was clinging for her life.
Daredevil fights Elektra…in a park — Daredevil, 2003
That’s right, we have yet another terrible fight scene from Ben Affleck’s Daredevil movie. Matt Murdock and Bullseye tried hard to claim the title of worst fight scene of the movie, but they’ve been bested. (Worsted?)
Earlier in the movie, Murdock has a short but so-very-cringey fight against Elektra (Jennifer Garner), who he’ll later fight beside. It starts because he follows her around until she catches him out in a park. When he asks for her name, they…take off their jackets and start a martial arts battle?
The fight is more like play-fighting; no brutal punches are thrown. With an audience of kids, they fight — although I’d say it’s much closer to a dance — on top of playground equipment.
As bad as it was, it must have done something right. Two years later, Elektra was given her own solo movie, even though it wasn’t particularly great either.
Hulk vs. Gamma Dogs — Hulk, 2002
Five years before the Marvel Cinematic Universe debuted its version of Bruce Banner in The Incredible Hulk, we had Hulk, with Eric Bana in the title role. Directed by Ang Lee, one of the most acclaimed filmmakers today, Hulk could have been a fantastic movie…and it wasn’t awful, but it has not aged well.
Hulk is a slow burn of a movie that feels even slower, since it’s following a character famous for wrecking stuff every which way. It takes a long while for the Hulk to actually appear, and even longer before we see him “smash.” The first time we see him in a fight, he takes on three mutant dogs.
So what’s the problem? The trio of dogs, including a poodle, is made using some truly abysmal CGI. Compared to the Hulk battles in later movies, this fight comes off as hilarious, not thrilling. And the whole thing is too dark to be fun.
At least with this movie, the climactic battle was good enough to make us forget the time the Hulk took on some dogs…almost.
Suicide Squad vs. Enchantress — Suicide Squad, 2016
Here we have the second team-up battle to make the list: it’s the Suicide Squad against Enchantress. Suicide Squad looked very promising: it had in intriguing evil-vs-evil premise, a terrific cast, and some excellent trailers. And then it was terrible.
The final battle is a perfect example of why the movie failed. When the Suicide Squad show up in a dark room for a final showdown with Enchantress, things instantly become hard to follow. There’s no real continuity to the fight, characters somehow show up in different places with each cut.
There are no real emotional stakes, with none of our heroes (or villains, depending on how you look at it) having any personal motive to take down Enchantress. They’re fighting to save the world, sure, but why bother if everyone in it is so boring?
Overall, this battle is just a forgettable mess. The ending is also way too predictable. Hopefully we can rely on Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn to deliver something more interesting when he releases The Suicide Squad, a soft reboot/sequel, in 2021.
At the moment, fans are wondering if director David Ayer has an “Ayer Cut” of Suicide Squad tucked away somewhere to show them, since various scenes were either sliced up or reshot, which accounts for why much of the movie is so rough. Anything to make this fight better is okay with us.
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