It’s time once again to recap another episode of Game of Thrones through the magic of GIFs. This week, we tackle Episode 606, “Blood of My Blood,” and thanks to the amazing folks at COUB, our GIFs are HD and come with sound! Let’s get started, shall we?
We open “Blood of My Blood” right where we left off at the end of “The Door.” Meera is pulling Bran, and Bran is getting a front row seat to just about everything that has happened in Westeros since the beginning of the Dawn Age.
If you want to give yourself a seizure, this next GIF will definitely do the trick.
Suddenly, a wild Uncle Benjenhands™ appeared!
On the way to Horn Hill, Samwell’s ancestral home, we find out that Sam is a nervous talker.
And then Sam drops the worst kind of meet-the-parents bomb on Gilly: his dick of a dad is prejudiced against wildlings.
Sam’s mom is super nice, as is his sister. How do they stay so pleasant with Randyll around?
Gilly and Sam’s momma seem to be getting along swimmingly, which is good for Sam, because you never want to have to choose between your mom and your girl.
At King’s Landing, in the Great Sept of Baelor, the High Sparrow was pulling the strings on his Tommen puppet.
Tommen got to see his wifey, and his voice seems to have climbed a few octaves since last they talked.
Back at Horn Hill, the Tarly family dinner isn’t going as well as Sam had planned.
Gilly had enough of Lord Tarly’s dickish behaviour, and gave him a verbal what for. Too bad she gave away the fact that she was a wildling in the process.
As in real life, there’s always that one family member who talks politics and spouts racist viewpoints at dinner. For the Tarlys, Randyll is that guy.
For a moment, it seemed as if Samwell had given up all hope of being with Gilly, but then he manned up and swept her off her feet.
And as the ultimate f**k you to his pops, Sam absconded with Heartsbane, the Tarly’s ancestral Valyrian steel sword.
In Braavos, Arya took in more of that play, and seemed to enjoy the death of Joffrey…like, really enjoyed it.
Tone it down, Arya.
Arya was going to carry out poisoning Lady Crane, but in the end, decided against it.
Of course, that sat just fine with the Waif…
…because she tattled on A Girl to Sexy Jesus, who sanctioned Arya’s death.
Arya retrieved Needle from its hiding place in the rocks, and hid, waiting for the right time to strike.
Back in King’s Landing, Mace the Ace sung his troops a rousing war song.
Outside the Sept of Baelor, the Tyrell army was ready to charge, and Jaime was ready for a fight.
Then Jaime got pissed and rode right up the steps.
The High Sparrow wasn’t impressed, because he had an ace in the hole. That smug smile of his…I wanna smash it.
Mace the Ace was confused, and as usual, his mommy had to explain things to him.
After all the showboating by the High Sparrow, Jaime was stripped of his position as the Lord Commander of the Kingsguard.
Jaime and Cersei were none too pleased with the events of the day, and speechified as only Lannisters can. And then there was twincest.
North of the Wall, Uncle Benjenhands™ revealed himself to Bran and Meera, and explained what happened to him waaaaaaaay back in Season 1.
Finally, we head back across the Narrow Sea, to where Daenerys was leading her own group of Brothraki™ toward Meereen.
But something was distracting Dany, and she rode her horse around the corner…
…and came back on a dragon! Hey, what happened to the horse?
Dany gave a speech, because what would an episode of Game of Thrones be without a speech from Daenerys?
Then Dany rocked out and really got the Brothraki™ horde super pumped!
We now go live to the campaign headquarters for Daenerys Targaryen, where she is making her victory speech.
I’d vote for her.
That’s it for this week kiddos, tune in next week when we GIF recap Game of Thrones Episode 607, “The Broken Man.”