The Witcher gets the cheesy ’90s makeover it deserves

I enjoyed The Witcher on Netflix, but I can’t be the only one to think it came off as a little…well, pulpy. People throwing magic blasts back and forth, messy-looking dragons, beefcake and cheesecake shots…I mean, clearly none of this kept the show from becoming a big hit, and good on it for that, but I definitely got some mid-’90s daytime fantasy vibes from The Witcher. It was kind of like Hercules: The Legendary Journeys, but with cursing and a bigger budget.

Clearly, Nerdist thought so too, because they mocked up an intro to The Witcher: The Legendary Journeys that perfectly recalls that era of fantasy TV. Check it out:

“Chaos beckons, and destiny calls. Toss a coin…to your witcher.” I love that they downgraded the effects on the magic spells to be period accurate! And the lines of fire for split-screen. “And starring Bullegum the Horse as Roach the Horse.” This is great.

For comparison’s sake, here’re the intros for the Hercules made-for-TV movies from 1994. Shockingly, I couldn’t seem to find the original show credits on YouTube. What gives, internet?

As long as we’re comparing The Witcher to other shows, here’s King of the Hill in your eye:

And here’s Geralt high out of his mind and remembering his past life as a superhero:

"WFT? from netflixwitcher"

The second season of The Witcher probably won’t be out until 2021. Plenty more comparisons to be drawn before then!

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