Once more, Star Trek: Strange New Worlds pulls off a unique episode this week, as “Four-and-a-Half Vulcans” shows what happens when some crew members take logic too far and boasts a unique guest star to boot.
Una’s log states the ship is heading to Plumantree III, a vacation planet for shore leave. Naturally, she plans to stay on the ship and work. La’an senses that Una wants to avoid someone on the planet, brushing off Spock’s attempt to sit with them as they were having a “debrief.” Una wonders what was going on between the pair, with La’an just as confused.
Batel and Pike are sparring, but they're interrupted by an emergency message from the Vulcans.
The Vulcans have a situation on the planet Tezaar, a civilization not even possessing warp drive, meaning this could clash with the Prime Directive. The only way they can help is to not just look like Vulcans, but become Vulcans.
Reverse engineering the serum that turned Spock human in season 2, Chapel injects herself, Pike, Uhura, La’an, and Pelia. Except for the last one, they all collapse, overwhelmed by the rush of emotions in Vulcan DNA, with Pelia (apparently immune thanks to her alien nature) complaining she missed the “fun” as the quartet takes on Vulcan ears and manners.
Pelia suggests Spock join them as a Vulcan, with the four pointing out he was only half-Vulcan, giving us the episode title and a unique Vulcan power walk to the transporter. The crew is utterly stunned that a job they assumed would take hours is solved in literally less than a minute.
Ortegas just has to jinx it, stating, “I thought this would be more exciting.” Just as Spock is noting the irony of being the “least Vulcan person present,” M’Benga injects the serum, and nothing happens, meaning the four are stuck as Vulcans. Just to sell it, the usual opening credits see Pike speaking in clipped Vulcan tones.
A most illogical turn
Una’s log notes how the serum has the effect of making the transformed quartet in a “logical state” that usually takes Vulcans years to develop. Chapel believes, as a Vulcan, she can fix it fast. Spock suggests they be confined to handle their feelings, only to be outvoted by logic, with M’Benga retaliating by ordering them on the ship.
Beto finds Uhura in the lounge with her, discussing their potential date and how they have to address a problem. James Kirk beams aboard, hoping to have some fun with Sam.
Batel is affected by Pike cleaning up the quarters and stating he could now handle Pasallak as a fellow Vulcan. He also shares how the human smell is disgusting to Vulcans, obviously not grasping how that makes Batel feel.
Spock finds Chapel running a half dozen experiments at once, boasting of how much she can get done and understanding Spock better. She then orders the pair away. In the lounge, Kirk attempts at small talk with La’an, but it's naturally not going well. La’an discusses the ship’s weapon system and orders Scotty to show her the ship’s weapons systems. Kirk brings Scotty over to warn him that this is out of character for any Vulcan.
On that cue, Pike orders the senior staff to the ready room (with the chairs missing) to share that they have created the serum, but decide they would remain Vulcans permanently.
The first effect is Pike ordering the ship to take on 14 different shifts. That drives the rest of the staff to discuss the situation, noting that they have no grounds to force the others to take the serum, with Spock pointing out that this is an odd turn. Oh, and he agrees with Pelia on how “Vulcans can be jerks.”
Pike finds La’an messing with the systems as Pike brings up the part of Vulcan history he isn't permitted to discuss. They speak at once with “Romulans,” which gives us the sight of dual raised eyebrows. They each hint that it involves time travel, and this is the last time they would discuss it.
Ortegas finds Uhura and Beto together and is struck by how Beto is not only talking in a calm manner but also by the fact that her burger-loving brother has suddenly become a vegan. Spock walks into the lab just in time to catch Chapel breaking up with Korby, as she believes romance is illogical, adding she is also breaking up with Spock, as La’an is a better fit for him. She even declares she is breaking off every friendship she has on the ship, as they are a “waste of time.”
Kirk and Scotty find La’an declaring the ship’s weapons have to be more powerful, and they are going to help. Ortegas confronts Uhura, who confesses she used a mind meld to make Beto go along with all she wanted. Naturally, Ortegas is upset and says that if Vulcan Uhura can't see why the real Beto is a catch, “she’s an idiot.”
Enter an odd “expert”
Una and Spock discuss the situation as Spock talks of how they may need to alter their katra, which could be dangerous. Una says she knows a Vulcan expert in this, who is her ex. Una warns Spock he is going to see a side of her she prefers kept secret. They meet up with the Vulcan named Doug (Patton Oswalt), whose parents were more into Vulcan culture (his siblings were named Susan and Pete). He shows as much passion as a Vulcan could with Una tongue-tied before claiming Spock is her husband.
Spock is utterly baffled at Una insisting they have kids, dropping a drink on her to give them space, as Una confesses that being around Doug has turned her into a mess.
Speaking of tough dinners, Batel has to put up with Pike and Pasalk, with Pike giving an honest assessment that Batel isn't ready. That causes her to erupt at both, snapping that her former boss favored Vulcans, and it is illogical that he suddenly likes Pike as a Vulcan before ordering both of them out.
Doug is able to see through Spock and Una’s “marriage” as he speaks warmly about humans and agrees to help. La’an orders Kirk to reconfigure the weapons, as she is planning to start a war between the various races, and when he refuses, she punches him down. Scotty tries to get through to her to no avail, so he tricks her into hitting a button that shocks her unconscious, impressing Kirk.
Doug manages to get the katras of Pike, Chapel, and Uhura fixed, allowing them to be restored to human form, with all three feeling like total idiots with amends to make. La’an, however, refuses to revert, with Spock entering her mindscape to sway her. Spock believes her Khan DNA is somehow affecting her.
The pair engages in a fight with old-school music to go with it. Midway through, the fight turns into a dance that ends with them in each other’s arms and La’an agreeing to change back. Uhura apologizes to Beto for her actions. She is ready to leave, with Beto suggesting they start over with some shore leave.
Pike and Batel get a message from Pasalk, with Batel believing she is being fired. Instead, Pasalk reveals he is planning to retire and wants Batel to replace him, as he is impressed by her blunt honesty. Pike asks if this means he is slightly forgiven.
Korby and Spock see Chapel in her quarters as she apologizes with some soup. La’an apologizes to Una for her actions. Una talks of a wild time with Doug, involving a shuttle and skinny-dipping. At this point, Doug enters with flowers as Una tells La’an, “Don’t wait up.”
Kirk and Scotty talk about Scotty's lack of a plan, with Kirk noting, “Mr. Scott, we make a great team.” They toast each other as the episode ends—except for a post-credits scene where Spock and Doug discuss everything from birthdays to “pull my finger” and more, serving as a nice coda to a humorous episode.
While the plot is rushed in places, seeing the humans turn into Vulcans is fun, as is Spock getting a taste of how people feel around him. It is also nice to have Kirk and Scotty forging a connection and Batel getting a big break to round out the hour.
Star Trek: Strange New Worlds season 3 streams new episodes on Thursdays on Paramount+.