Valar Morghulis: Who’s most likely to die in “Stormborn”?
By Corey Smith
Valar morghulis: All men (and women) must die. But when?
Welcome to Valar Morghulis, a weekly column about death and destruction in the wide world of Westeros. Each week, we’ll try to predict how likely every character on Game of Thrones is to breathe their last in the upcoming episode. We’ll also review what we got right, as well as what we got horribly wrong, last time.
Last week’s episode, “Dragonstone,” had quite the body count, but no one with a name died. Before we look ahead to “Stormborn,” let us pause for a moment and reflect upon the glorious destruction of House Frey.
House Frey: We did not have House Frey on our list, because lets face it: when has an entire house been wiped off the map in a single episode? Even when most of House Tyrell went up in flames in the Sept of Baelor, Olenna still survived.
Arya is turning out to be an efficient little killer. Anyone else on her list should be very, very afraid.
And now on to this week’s episode, “Stormborn.”
****Percentages refer to how likely the character is to die, not survive.****
1-8. Jory-Cassel-picking-fight-with-Jaime-Lannister surprised
You had, like, three scenes in Season 1. Why did you pick a fight with the Kingslayer? These are the characters we think most likely to die in Season 7. We hope they all have their affairs in order.
1. The Mountain: 100%. We’re keeping the Mountain at the top so we’re sure we get one right. After all, he’s already dead.
2. Septa Unella: 75%. Cersei was busy last week with Euron, but perhaps she’ll have more time this week to play with her toys…and then to kill them when she tires of that.
3. The Sand Snakes: 75%. Euron promised Cersei a gift, and that means someone’s head(s) is going to roll. Most of the gifts on Cersei’s wishlist are in Dany’s forces, including the Sand Snakes, who conspired to kill Cersei’s daughter Myrcella. As they’re not very bright, the Sand Snakes’ number could be up.
4. Ellaria Sand: 50%. If Euron does best the Sand Snakes, he may at least attempt to bring Ellaria into Cersei alive, since she was the ringleader. Then again, he might not. He’s nuts.
5. Yara Greyjoy: 50%. Like the Dornish contingent, Yara is in Euron’s crosshairs. The only question becomes whether or not Euron kills her on sight or captures her alive. It’s hard to predict crazy.
6. Theon Grejoy: 40%. Theon has only slightly lower odds than Yara, because we’ve spent more time with him over the course of the show.
7. Jorah Mormont: 35%. We caught our first glimpse of Jorah Mormont last week, and his situation looked dire. The greyscale has spread, and Jorah looks no closer to finding a cure.
8. Grey Worm: 35%. As one of Queen Daenerys’ primary commanders, Grey Worm is likely to lead troops into battle, which puts him at risk. And if Dany wants to invade Westeros, there will be plenty of battles to command.
