Knee-Jerk Reactions to “The Last of the Starks”
FLEA BOTTOM BROWN FIVE: Everybody’s gotta get on the screen time merry-go-round.
One place where season 8 sometimes feels a little clunky is when every single pairing of characters has to be given a little moment, often in the midst of a gathering where everybody is assembled. In this episode particular, the proceedings felt draggy as we moved around the feast, shifting from duo to trio to duo, as if the showrunners wanted to make sure we remembered all of them were there.
FLEA BOTTOM BROWN FOUR: Things hit rock bottom in the drinking games.
Remember the last time Tyrion played a drinking game with Missandei and Grey Worm in Meereen? That was a stinker, and it’s surprising that Thrones decided to return to that well. This show rarely seems to hit the mark when the characters are getting sauced and having a little fun. Drunk Tormund is a sloppy, wailing disaster.
FLEA BOTTOM BROWN THREE: Off-screen battles suck, and so do off-screen reveals.
It’s the final season of Game of Thrones, and I don’t like having any big moments unseen. The battle between Euron and Dany’s fleets were given the short shrift, and why didn’t we get to see Bran tell Sansa and Arya about the whole Jon-Aegon thing? C’mon, man. Their reactions — especially Sansa’s — would have been priceless.
FLEA BOTTOM BROWN TWO: Jaime and Brienne and the office party hookup.
I have to admit, a big part of me was always shipping Jaime and Brienne, but the platonic nature of their love and respect for each other seemed to exist outside of the sexual realm, regardless of how fun it was to consider. Their soul-mate link existed on a different level.
This consummation, as much as I thought I’d wanted it and as cute as the actual scene was, ultimately felt forced. We’d already gotten romps out of Jon/Dany and Arya/Gendry; we didn’t need to see one that shouldn’t have happened.
FLEA BOTTOM BROWN ONE: Sansa can’t keep a secret.
What the hell, Sansa? I really like you, especially the season 8 Sansa, but…what the hell? Why go blabbing Jon/Aegon’s huge secret to Tyrion? It was obvious from the get-go that you were going to spill the beans; that “I swear” to Jon was one of the lamest promises in TV history. She might as well have said, “I’m swearing but I’m really not.”
And now Tyrion has leaked the info to Varys, and the Spider is obviously planning to use it to “protect the realm.” If anything Varys does directly or indirectly hurts Jon, then it’s all Sansa’s fault.