All 73 episodes of Game of Thrones, ranked worst to best
2. “Hardhome,” Season 5, Episode 8
When I first watched this episode, I was jumping on my couch like some sort of drunken gorilla as the battle at Hardhome unfolded, unable to contain my excitement. That deserves a high place on the list.
The battle was doubly exciting for book fans because, unlike the Red Wedding, it was a complete unknown. It stands as some of the strongest evidence of why Game of Thrones is the best television show currently running, and in contention for best of all time.
Before the battle begins, we check in with all our favorite characters, or at least the ones still alive. Cersei is still imprisoned by the High Sparrow, and refuses to budge an inch. Love her or hate her, Cersei is the most consistently written character on the show.
Back in Winterfell, Sansa is still locked in the bridal suite by her loving husband Ramsay, and is attended to by Reek/Theon. After Reek betrayed Sansa’s northern friend in the previous episode, Sansa explodes on Theon, and Sophie Turner shows us why she’s so good in this role. Her rage cows Reek into confessing that Bran and Rickon, Sansa’s little brothers, are actually alive, which gives her a reason to go on.
Meanwhile, in Essos, Tyrion and Daenerys meet for the first time, a treat for book-readers, as this has yet to happen in the novels. Tyrion’s logical assessment of the state of Dany’s rule and the Seven Kingdoms is spot-on, and it’s a joy to watch Dany and Tyrion converse.
But tasty as they are, those are just the appetizers are over, and now we have arrived at the main course. After coming to an agreement, Tormund and Jon arrive at the wildling settlement of Hardhome, looking to take as many people south of the Wall as possible, with the help of Stannis’ fleet. We stay in this location for the rest of the episode, and every second is gold.
Before the horror begins, we get a couple of laugh-out-loud moments (e.g. Tormund beating Rattleshirt, Wun Wun the giant mouthing off to Dolorous Edd, newcomer Karsi’s thoughts on respecting her ancestors). As the laughter dies down, the dogs in the camp start to howl, a slow snow cloud rolls over the huddled masses, and viewers suck in their breath. If this scene doesn’t get your heart racing, call a doctor because you are as dead as the wights that suddenly swarm the walls. It’s nonstop action from there on out.
Jon and Tormund lead the defense, even though we can tell right away that it’s a doomed cause. Jon and the leader of the Thenns make a stand against a single White Walker who beats Jon within an inch of his life. From the very first episode of the series we have been shown the White Walkers’ ability to shatter steel weapons like glass, so when Jon blocked the White Walker’s spear, I literally jumped and cheered. Jon and the White Walker are both shocked, but Jon recovers first and slashes, turning his foe into enough ice cubes for a frat party. Valyrian Steel for the win!
Jon’s victory is short-lived as the camp is quickly overrun. In the first of two ice-cold middle fingers to Jon and the viewers, the leader of the White Walkers, the Night’s King, throws hundreds of his wights off a cliff, just to show Jon how little he fears the Night’s Watch. And after Jon literally makes it out on the last boat, the Night’s King slowly walks out on the docks, and raises every single dead human from the grave. Check. Mate. Set. Match. Knockout. Game over.
And the most popular Game of Thrones meme ever is born.